Being Married, Will And Dream Visits!

Will was dead center in my mind last night. No matter what else I tried to shift my brain power to, it kept bouncing back to him. So after awhile I stopped fighting it. I figure, if it's this stong - there must be a reason for it. So about 11:30 pm I let the thoughts just come in. There were so many images, words and mini movies - all spinning what seemed like out of control. It reminded me of a kaleidoscope and with every turn of the view finder, there was something different to see/hear. But I wasn't the one turning the view finder.

There were a lot of "what if" scenarios - almost as if Will was "what if'ing" the connection into the ground. Then it would shift to an exuberant happiness - then down to an overwhelming sadness. And it continued. Any time there was happiness - there were images of he, myself and my son together - even if it was eating popcorn and watching a movie on TV. The sadness was always when he was pacing in his apartment - alone.

Finally about 1:00 am I had enough and told Will that I'll meet him in dream time. I walked down my dream path (as I like to call it) towards my dream portal/workspace. My path is always through a pine forest - I love the feel of the pine beneath my bare feet and the smell. As I round a corner - there is Ethan. I went over and gave him a big ole hug. I asked if he was back to help. He shook his head no - this is just a visit. We both could feel Iris in the background - just watching. I leaned into Ethan and asked - is she always like this? You mean a control freak? - Yes Ethan replied with a chuckle. But she gets results - her charges always travel down the path they are supposed to. I guess that's comforting - I said. He replied - it should be.

So we're walking and I asked Ethan if I'm doing something wrong? Is there something I'm meant to do that I haven't done yet? He shook his head -- no -- the ball is in Will's court. It's completely up to him. I asked - why is this so difficult for him if he "knows". Ethan put his arm round me and answered - because change is difficult, no matter matter much you want it (this sounded very familiar to me - AKA my divorce last year) and you add to that shyness and an uncertainty if this is all in his head -- and there you go. Is this something that he'll get over. Ethan shrugged - he has to or this will repeat in the next life. And quite frankly - there isn't time to repeat this - you two have to be together so that the next step happens. So this is a must for him. His guides will keep putting things, reminder, in front of him so that he takes that next step.

The next step - involves Bill and Ted doesn't it? Ethan nods - also Clive, Peter, John, Larry and a woman and her partner that you have failed to explore yet. I don't have time for her right now.

(update - I have written about her before - I called her Jo:
http://gypsyadvice.com/alliestwocents/2007/03/stuff-ted-and-new-one-named-jo.html)

Well, Ethan said - just like Will will have things in front of him about you - you will keep having things in front of you about her. This isn't something that can be put off. Since she and Will know one another - do I meet her before Will calls or after? Ethan replied - that hasn't been written yet.

Something catches my eye off the path and I go get it - a cell phone. I'm giving this to Will during our visit. Ethan laughed - of course you are.

I entered my dream portal and Ethan stayed behind.

I'm on a train with many people - but it's not overcrowded. I'm at one end of a small car, Will is at the other end. To my left sits a woman who I am friends with in my waking life. Her partner is sitting next to Will. I see him lean over to Will and start to talk about me. I can hear what is said, even though I shouldn't be able to:

G = Guy W = Will

G = You know Allie?
W = From Gypsy Advice? Yes. Her and her son.
G = Word is that she's obsessed with you.

Will arises his eyebrows on that one -- and this guy is looking right at me -- I'm staring at him trying to say with my eyes - WTF and shut the hell up. But he goes on...

W = You don't say.
G = She thinks about you all the time.
W = I see.

I look over at this my friend and ask - what in the hell is he doing? She shrugs. Make him stop - I said.

Next thing I know, Will has a magazine in his hand and he sits a couple of rows behind me. I can feel him staring at me -but I refuse to look over at him. He is now sitting behind me - his left hand is on the back of my chair - he's tapping his fingers. I look and he's wearing a brand new shiny wedding ring.

I look over at my friend and say - hell no. I stand up and I'm cussing to myself. A lot of - WTF came out. I started to walk away in the opposite direction - she asked - where are you going? I yelled - this is whacked - I'm waking up. So I walk through the cars shouting at myself to wake up and I finally do.

I laid there in bed -- what in the hell was that? I talked to myself: Why was that scene there? He's not married - I know he's not married. But the ring he had on - looked just like (my ex) when we first got married, same ring. Will has been in an on again off again relationship for over 10 years - maybe she feels that they are married even if they are not? And I'm not obsessed. I have a life - and he's not center stage.

I gotta go back into that dream. So I did...

The train came to a stop and we all got off and went into a huge formal garden - the kind you would see outside of a castle. I'm on a balcony and I see Will. He sees me. I turn the opposite way and go inside this room made from shrubs. There are a bunch of people in there and someone asked me if I was okay. I try not to cry - because I'm very angry and frustrated. I said - no I'm not okay. So I go back out of that room and into where Will is still at. I have two ways to go in order to get to the other side of this balcony- I see Will walking towards me on one side - I start to walk the opposite - but then think -- nah...and I walk right past him - it takes everything I have not to look over at him. But as we pass he said - Allie - wait -please. I stop. He's alongside of me -and it's automatic - I thread my arm through his and we walk.

I need to know - he said - I need to know if I have a chance.

I look over to him - you're the only one.

We're silent for a few steps.

Do you understand what I mean? He nods. There is no one else - no one.

Will smiled and let out a sign of relief.

But I don't do the married thing - I'm not playing second fiddle. I'm not someone's afterthought. I went through two marriages where I was the afterthought and was cheated on -- I will never do that to another woman.

But you have - he replied.

Yes - in my early 20's. I learned that lesson by being on the receiving end twice of men who didn't give a crap about me. And I will never do that again - no matter what I feel for the person. I deserve better.

Will replied - understood. But you'd never be second fiddle in my life.

I reached into my pocket and pulled out the cell phone - and handed it to him. Then first work it out with your ex, she is an ex right?

He nods - but she doesn't see it that way.

Find a way to make her understand and then call me. And could you hurry up, we're not getting any younger.

Then I woke up.

As strange as it sounds - when I woke up I felt Will reading my blog to see if I wrote about this dream yet. He'll check back until he reads this - and then his uncertainty won't have such a hold on him. I feel this is why Iris was adamant about me posting this entry today and not waiting until Monday.

And I must admit - it is very strange to feel that you'd take a bullet for someone in a heartbeat when you have only met them once (in this life - obviously). It's an unconditional sacrifice - just like it would be for my son. There's no thinking about it - it's automatic.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

The 9th And Final Soul Circle Member Is In Place.

It's 12:50 am and I should be in bed. But I'm not. Why you ask? Because I was putting the editing touches on the Gypsy Magic Dreamers book. Looking this book over - it's the best out of the 4 of written and I can't wait to release the darn thing! Should be heading to the printers soon. Remember my guide Robert? Well, he's hanging out here saying that it's about time. I think that he's going to help me to get to the next level as soon as that book is off to the printer. He's nodding his head -- so I'd have to say yes.

Does Robert have anything to do with Robert Bruce? Yep. But until RB believes in guides - I'm not saying a word.

But right now Ethan, Robert, Bridget and Jezell and are around me -- just as happy as a bunch of peas in a pod. They look too happy.

Bridget steps up and says that they are so pleased because the next stage is here. And each of them took a part in getting me here.

Right at midnight on 9/9/07 (which in numerology it's a 9-9-9 day.....very powerful) I had a vision to write a symbol in my journal along with saying a few phrases. As I did this I could feel a swoop of energy go through me and Bill was right there. I kept hearing - the Age of Atlantis has returned. I had a brilliant circle of energy coming from me and I looked to see Bill, Ted, Will, Matt, Peter, Clive, Larry coming towards me. Off to my right I see DC - who in real life is really good friends with Bill. I turn and I say - what? He says - are you ever going to get to me or what? Then it dawned on me -- he's #9. It hit me like a ton of bricks. So on a 9-9-9 day I finally discovered who #9 is in our soul circle. 8 men and me - 1 female. I like my odds:)

But with that realization - it takes me back to when I saw Bill back in 2005. DC was there. In fact, DC kept showing up everywhere I turned. I had no idea why. But the universe was TRYING to show me - hey you -- here's another one in your soul circle -- wake up -- you need him to be a complete group. But I was so focused on Bill - that DC slipped under my radar. Until now.

Will popped up in my telepathic thoughts today. I could see him looking at his watch -- saying over and over -- Allie it's time - do something. Send that letter. I don't care what it says - just send it. I know what he's talking about. I had a dream that in order for us to meet - I sent him a letter about a business proposition and he responded. It's on my "to do" list for the week.

I have been listening to "Little Wonders" by Rob Thomas. I cannot get enough of this song. When I ask why -- I don't even get the full thought out and Bill shows up. So this song deals with him. I looked up the lyrics:

Let it go, let it roll right off your shoulder,
Don't you know, the hardest part is over, let it in,
Let your clarity define you in the end,
You will only just remember how it feels.
Our lives are made, in these small hours, these little wonders
These twisted turns of fate, time falls away,
But these small hours, these small hours, still remain.
Let it slide, let your troubles fall behind you, let it stand,
Till you feel it all around you,
And I don't mind if it's me you need to turn to, we'll get by,
It's the heart that really matters in the end.
Our lives are made, in these small hours, these little wonders
These twisted turns of fate, time falls away,
But these small hours, these small hours, still remain.
All of my regret, will wash away somehow,
But I cannot forgive the way I feel right now.
In these small hours, these little wonders, these twisted turns of fate,
All these twisted turns of fate, these twisted turns of fate
Yeah, times falls away
But these small hours, these small hours, still remain.
They still remain, these little wonders, all these twisted turns of fate
time falls away, but these small hours, these little wonders
Still remain.


All I can do is smile.

And I think I can hear Bill calling me -- off to bed I go!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

FYI - Who Is Who...

I have had a heck of a jump in visitors to this blog. For the most part I do not use real names unless indicated. I know that there are a lot of names that I do use and for newbies to this blog - it can get mighty confusing.

So here is a cheat sheet:

MICHAEL, RAPHAEL, GABRIEL, HANIEL - Archangels

ETHAN, JEZELL, ROBERT and HANNA - Spirit Guides

BRIGIT - Goddess

GALADRIEL - Fairy

BILL and TED - Soul mates

WILL and MATT (real names) - Soul Cluster

LARRY, CLIVE, PETER, DC (new one) and just about anyone else male I've mentioned - Members of Soul Circle

CINDY - Tracey (her real name that I now use) my intutive friend

If I've forgotten anyone - post a note and I'll explain.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

Spidey Sense, Change And The Gang's All Here!

You have all heard of Spiderman right? He has his spidey sense when he senses something is about to happen. Well, Allie's spidey sense is on overdrive. My nerves are hanging out on the outside of my body and are posed and ready to assimilate any information that comes their way. I can tell something is about to happen. I can smell it. I don't know what - don't know if it's good or bad -- I just know that something major is about to happen. Now is this major something that affects me or people as a whole? Good question. I know that it severely affects me. But the sense I get about affecting other people -- is mixed. Quite possibly by the trickle down affect. So this whatever will happen to me - and then based on what I do - then other people are effected. I feel greatly affected. Damn, I wish I could pull in more.

What I can see are round shiny silver balls, almost like solid silver spheres. Some are large, others are very small and can zing across the room. No, I have no clue what in the heck that means. But there is also a red liquid and a white tarp or blanket? The color green is everywhere and it all feels so sterile. For some reason I can see Will. He's sitting in a seat and his hands are reaching for me. The seat reminds me of one you would see in the Space Shuttle or maybe in a Virtual Reality simulator. Speaking of which, can you imagine having the rooms they did on Star Trek where anything was possible - any world, any person, any situation and it was all so real like. What were those rooms called? I'm drawing a blank. But just imagine being able to pay to be in a room where all of your fantasies could come true - if even for a short time. Humm...you know who I'd have in there -- Sawyer from LOST. Good God that man is hot:) Just a few hours and I'd be on a high that may last weeks:)

Okay, reel me back in -- now where was I? Oh yes, Will. He wants me to sit in the seat next to him and hold his hand. Hummm....then there's nothing. Now I can see lights - going off everywhere to a point where it really makes me squint to see. I can hear my name being yelled out -someone or something wants my attention. Will and I are on -- Oprah? Huh? What in the heck are we doing there? He and I are sitting on stage discussing something about our connection -- I'm not able to see or hear any more.

Brigit comes over from the right and asks me if I'm okay. I tell her that I'm great. She says - you said you were ready. I reply - yes I am - let it begin. She smiles and says that she knew Jezell would be able to talk to me. She fades and Larry appears! I'm so happy to see him! And by that wicked smile, he's happy to see me too. He tells me that whenever I'm feeling overwhelmed, to call out to him and he will make sure to calm the energies around me. He swears that nothing will happen to me. Now John appears next to him - the men shake hands and Larry goes.

John and I are in a cave. I should be freezing, but I'm not. He and I are talking about a few things and I looked at him and asked if at any time in any life if we've slept together? He stops thinks about it for a second, then says no. I said good. He smiles and says that sleeping with me would be like sleeping with his sister - and we both agree that it's a yuck! We find that part funny and yet refreshing that we never will have to worry about a physical relationship in bed. He says that it has always been his job to protect the circle and it's a job that he does not take lightly. He goes on to tell me that I will need the most of his protection over the next several months and he will be at my call - while Will, Bill and Ted will be there to love me. I ask if he knows what in the hell is about to happen that everyone is coming up to me? That is when Peter and Clive arrive. Wow - do the two of them look good. I ask them the same sex question that John and I were just talking about -- and they both gave me the same sister comment. Good:) So with all three there - I had to ask them what is going on. I am assured that no one knows. Except that I will be going through change and a very stressful time.

Great -- I think -- more stress, just what I need. I am told - by Peter - that although this will be stressful, I am assured that it will turn into good stress in time.

And with that everyone gives me a kiss and they are gone.

Boy- that was odd. Telling you what I was seeing via visions and then getting pulled into a session all with interruption. What a flow I had going.

So, am I going to worry about what is coming up? I'll try not too as it appears this is something already in motion!

Don't forget to stop by The L Word on Second Life and visit me in The Planet at 8:00 pm EST tonight for some sex talk!

Have a great day!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)