Soul Cluster, Dreams and The Next Best Author!

I know - it's been awhile. No I haven't been off having the time of my life. Instead I've been neck deep in a pile of homework  - both for the U of A and for the Sex Coach Institute. Plus for U of A I am helping with a couple of research projects. I get to study for finals my birthday weekend - oh goodie - and then after final's week I'll have 1 week off and then it's time for summer classes. Don't get me wrong - I LOVE school - I only wish I had more time in the day to get everything done.

My kids show idea that H'wood likes but won't take a chance on - I decided to make it into a book series. I had thought about it before - but pushed it aside in hopes it would make it to TV. When that fell through - my manager suggested the book series. I decided ok. The only problem is my muse is on vacation.

It's been that way since I kept the guys at a distance. Then when I cut them off completely I kissed the muse goodbye. I don't like it - but it is what it is. I need them. It takes a lot for me to admit that. Because I not only don't want to need them, I don't like it. After Bill and Will slammed the collective door in my face - I really have wanted no part of them. But yet here I am.

Gloria, my guide/ascended master, has been encouraging to let my soul cluster back into my energy. I asked her - if I was supposed to cut ties of those who were holding me back - then why am I supposed to let them back? She answered - who ever said they were the ones who were holding you back? Ahhh...errrrr.....wasn't it my former guides? Or you? She said no - not exactly. While it was mentioned to cut ties it was not specific in who that should be. I said it was them. So I cut the ties.

Did I progress after the ties were cut? No. So they weren't the problem. Damn. Gloria then chimes in and says the problem is with me (dang it). What am I supposed to do - cut ties with me? Can you even do that? Yes she says (I'm like WHAT). But the ties you must cut are not to yourself - your soul. But to the ties of every negative thought - deed - action that has been done towards you. Every defeating blow - that is what you have to disconnect from.

I had to ask -- how in the world do I do that? Do I ask a guide/angel to do it? She says no. What I am to do is to call on my Star people for in their light  there is no wrong. That's exactly what I did. As I asked for them to remove all of the defeat I feel a tingling sensation (like pop rocks) start at my crown chakra and work it's way down my body all the way to my toes. It felt very energizing and soothing. One of the nicest things though when I did this is I saw Ted's face just as clear as could be in front of me. I've missed him.

I wrote the above before I went to school yesterday. Today (Tuesday) I'm at school again - but I'm watching over a research lab - this way I can finish the post!

Yesterday in class Will made his presence known. Wow! This would be something for the OBE blog (if you don't see a link to OBE - that means I haven't written it yet). Let's just say that he was back with all of the energy he's been holding back since I pushed him away last year. It took all I had to pay attention in class. He certainly shot up my sexual energy - good God! But at the same time what happened -- my muse came back. Which is what I needed.

Bill and Ted have also made an appearence - with Bill sticking around longer than Ted. I had a quick vision with the two of them - we were in a room with a lot of people. I had just got done yelling at Bill. I turned to leave the room and Ted said - Please don't leave. I stopped for a moment - then took a step towards the door. He said - Please. I turned to look at him  -- he steps in front of me, puts his hands on my shoulders and says - I didn't know. You can't punish all of us for something they did. It's not fair. Looking into those sexy green eyes of his must of gotten the best of me. Because before I knew it we were hugging. Vision ended. Vincent also showed up for a few seconds here and there during the day. It's like he pops in - checks on me - and leaves again.

On the way back from school last night I was thinking.....in past lives; Will has sacrificed himself a few times to save me. He has loved me completely and selflessly; Bill has loved me, treasured me and took care of me; Ted has devoted himself to me with love, selflessness and friendship; Vincent has loved me whole heartedly, has protected me and has always showed me the lighter side of life. In this life I'm starting to think that I have chosen to take it alone - void of them in the physcial sense - so that I realize what a lucky person I am to have these wonderful souls in my eternal life. Sure in some lives they've tried to control me, kill me or have me killed. With my attitude I can't say that I blame them - lol. But overall I have been extremely blessed. I do wish though that I would be able to tell them (physcially) in this life - but maybe it is just not to be.

Lately I've been having some odd dreams about my pets. Three nights ago it was Gimli running around the house like a mad dog. Just round and round and I was so scared that he was going to run out into the road. Two nights ago is was my cat Trouble. I had to put him in his carrier to take him to the vet. The landscape was all frozen. Snow and ice everywhere. Somehow Trouble has gotten outside. I looked and I looked and I couldn't find him - I was just beside myself. There were people around but I couldn't get anyone to help. Then last night is was all about Gimli again. Someone had opened the front door to my house (but it wasn't my house but my mom's) adn he ran out. There were a bunch of guys in the driveway and I asked them if they had seen Gimli. They're like - what? I'm saying a hyper blond lab - you can't miss him. No one knew where he was - I was heartbroken. Now Trouble has been to the vet several times - he seems to be ok. Gimli I never let out of my sight for very long when I'm home. So I don't know what's up.

T from MI - before I totally forget -- got your phone message - all kicks ass:) Hope to see you on Oct and good luck in May:):)

I would appreciate your help! I've entered my "Out of Body Ecstasy" book into "The Next Best Spiritual
Author" contest a week after everyone else. Could you please vote for me? And ask a few friends to do the same? The authors with the most votes are the ones who move to the next level. Each author is allowed
one vote per ...person per round. So far I don't have the votes needed to move to the next round. The phase ends on May 2nd (someone who you know and love - it's their birthday )
 
Link: http://www.nexttopauthor.com/profile.cfm?aid=2917
 
Thank you for your help!
 
Since I asked the Star People to help out and remove all of that yucky stuff I didn't need - I haven't had one bad, self-defeating or negative thought. It's been great!!
 
Yes - if you sent me email - whether it's one of my normal emails or on FB - I know:) I'll get back with you as soon as I can.
 
That's about it for now. Since the guys are back - I have a feeling more stuff is going to be happening!
 
Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

Bill, Dreams and Astral Travel

Bill. This man. Double super SIGH. Okay, so I've mentioned before that he is in my dreams every night. Now we don't always interact in the dreams. Most times one of us is in the background of the other's dream. I know - strange huh? But when we do interact, the dream stands out vividly. The other night my dream took me to my next door neighbor Bob's house. Now Bob in reality has a very big tutor house that he lives in all by himself. In the dream somehow our houses were connected. All we had to do was slide a door over and we could wall to and from the houses (like connecting rooms in a hotel).

Bob's house was under construction. He was cutting the ties with my house and making us have two separate structures with a driveway in between (how it actually is).

So I'm in his house looking up at this massive staircase in the center of his entry foyer. I look over to my right and there's Bill. He's in a t-shirt, jeans with a tool belt. I remember thinking to myself -- should I talk to him? If I do, should I act like I know him or act like a stranger? I decided on being friendly with him -- I figured hell, he's in my dream.

I asked how he's been. He tells me that he's been stressed. That's why he's here - to help out and hopefully burn off some of the stress he's carrying inside. We talked about what a nice house Bob has - Bill comments that someday he'd like to buy it. I say - of course - that means you'd live next door to me. He smiles and replies - I know.

The house is crawling with construction workers. I asked Bill if I could show him a wall that needs fixed. Next thing I know we're in my staircase and I'm showing him where the floor the closet (which is the closet in my office) has buckled out the wall. He agrees this is a problem (in real life this is a problem). He wants to see my closet.

As we go into my office I think to myself - Oh God, those two portraits of Bill and Ted are up, I wonder if he'll see them? Sure enough - he glances over by my desk and spies the pictures of him and Ted. He walks over and say - OMG - you're the one who had these drawn? And I say yes - did you like them? He said that he loved his. (note: in real life I did have 2 spirit portraits drawn of Bill and Ted - and sent to them. No copies are in my office).

I ask -- when are you going to get off your ass and honor our soul agreement? He replies - I don't know if I can. Bull shit - I say - you can do anything you want to. You're just a chicken shit like Will. Unbelievable - two men who really do not like one another in this life yet you two are both too scared of the possibilities. For the record - I think you're both a pain in the butt and I wouldn't want to be involved with either of you. But I do think that we could do a lot more good for the world together than separate.

What does he say to that? You belong to Vincent in this life. The look I gave him made him take a step back (must of been the evil PMS I'm gonna whip your ass look) and I yell - I belong to no one, I don't care what life I'm in.

Then I made myself wake up. Why oh why does he drive me insane? After I had this dream, I contacted a psychic I didn't know - never met - but came highly recommended and asked him if Bill is ever going to live up to our soul agreement. I'll let you know what he says. Because quite honestly I'm curious -- if you make a soul agreement with someone, can you use free will to brake that agreement? Or does it happen no matter what? I think I will talk about soul agreements in Monday's podcast.

I found a cool way to force myself to concentrate: when you're feeling rather spacey or scattered, take a nice white ball of light, have it enter your head via your third eye. Let the ball of light bounce around inside your head for a spell. It's more important to feel the ball of light moving about than to "see" it. When you feel more "crystal clear" have the ball exit your back - third eye chakra (aka back of your head).

The dream I had last night also incorporated astral travel. It was a whacked out experience. In my dream I hurt my leg. Well I should say that my leg was hurt so bad that I was being rushed into surgery in order to save it from being cut off. I was crying hard as they wheeled me into the OR. They wanted to give me drugs to put me to sleep so that they could operate. I told the nurse that if I fall asleep my soul is going to get lost. She thought I was silly and proceeded to put me under.

I felt my astral body pop out of my physical body. Off to the right I saw a light and went towards it. This was not the light of heaven, but a light to another dimension. As I was moving to the light - I looked over and saw my son and my mom & sisters waiting out in the waiting room. My son all of a sudden jumps up and tells me to come back.

I'm in the light and come out in Atlantis. It is so peaceful. I walk around talking to people. I asked where is Bill and Ted - they say they are not here, but Will is looking for me. I go off towards a temple and find Will on the steps. I ask him what he's doing here. He replies that he was waiting for me. I ask if he was hurt too? He says no.

In the background I can hear faint voices from the hospital. Something about me not waking up. Will tells me it's time to go back. I tell him no - I like it here. He says - in time. Now go home. I say no.

The next thing I know I'm off in some sort of white haze. I'm telling anyone who will listen that I've lost my way. I can't find my way back to my body. They keep telling me to think of my body and I'll go back. I keep trying and it's not working. I begin to panic.

In the background I hear my alarm go off. Next thing I know I'm falling, I slam back into my body and I turn off my alarm. I laid in bed for awhile trying to make sense of it all - and I couldn't.

For the next week I'm on spring break (YAY ME). During this time I'm going to start to tackle my gobs of email. And wow - do I mean gobs. I'll eventually get back to all of you - be patient:)

Have a wonderful weekend!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

Bill, Universal Light Expo and Updates!

Hi Everyone!

I didn't forget - Bill turned 51 on October 20th! I thought about him for most of the that day. He is still such a sex - sexy man. Good thing I have an eternity to meet up with him. Until then we'll keep meeting up in the dream state. When he's in the US we dream visit nightly. If he's traveling around the globe (which is what he usually does) we still connect during the day. The connections are brief - just like a "Hey, how ya doing? Miss you. Ciao." But I'll take what I can get.

I know - it's been awhile since I posted anything. Sorry about that. But I did warn you that while classes are going on my postings would dwindle off - there just isn't enough time in the day for it all. Especially since now I've been allowed to be a part of a research team. Granted - I'm just an assistant and get to do all the low level stuff - but it looks good on my grad school application.
College is going fine -- homeschool with my son is a challenge, but we're getting there. If he would just realize that writing things is a needed skill in life. Not everything mind you - but you do have to use a pen/pencil to paper - probably daily. Until then he spends a lot of time being grounded and I'm stressed far more than I should be.

Brodie isn't doing very well. If you all could send him healing light - I would (and so would he) appreciate it. The tumor hasn't made his nose malformed yet. But he has a hell of a time trying to breathe and his nose bleeds are horrible. Hard to believe it's been a year since Indy passed away. Man I miss that dog - so does Brodie.

Brodie - more than money - is the reason I'm not doing Maria's Cosmic Convention next weekend. I refuse to be gone when Brodie dies. I still feel horrible about Indy passing away in that vet office without me there. I just can't let it happen again. So for all of you who are going to the Cosmic Convention - I'm sorry I won't see you. I hope to be able to go in May - as long as it jives with my finals schedule.

The Universal Light Expo was great. I met a lot of new people, saw many familiar faces. A few people came down from MI (and who I usually see at Maria's fairs) to see the expo - stopped by to say hi. It was fabo to see them all. I had a family from Romania (who lives in Cleveland) stop by. They drove down specifically to see me. That was really nice of them. I sold a lot of books - did many readings - a very good weekend in all.

BTW - for all of you who have emailed or called to see how I'm doing because I haven't posted in a while or did a podcast - your thoughts and concerns were/are very appreciated!

The last several months I've had my feelings really hurt by a couple of people who I thought were my friends. One person I told everything to - everything - and that is not a easy thing for me to do. I'm usually very guarded and tell people & my friends only the parts that I know they'd want to hear or that they can grasp (if that makes sense). So very few people have ever known all of me - in fact - I can count on one hand how many (with fingers left over). Everyone of these people ended up stabbing me in the back one way or the other. It sucks. But since I'm in a 9 Personal Year - those people, places and things that are not in my highest good drift away. So in a way it's good. But it still sucks. Sucks even more that I miss them. But I don't allow myself a lot of "missing" time. That heart chakra of mine just keeps getting stepped on. Sheesh. I want it opened up and accepting - not closed off and defensive. Onward and upward!

Love life is still zero. I haven't found anyone that even peeks my interest a bit. Had a neighbor that did - but he moved and we could never find time to connect.

I stopped screenwriting. My heart just isn't in it any longer. I'm tired of my ideas sucking or my writing being less than desirable. Eventually I'll work on The Black Triangle again - because I know I have to - it's a Destiny Marker for me.

Of course Will was a Destiny Marker for me (and I for him) and we saw how well that worked out. Like with Bill - Will and I have eternity. But I would like to cross some things off my list.

Even though I'm not posting here in the blog or doing podcasts often - that doesn't mean I'm not doing readings. I've allotted myself time every week just for that. So please keep me in mind for your reading needs:)

I've had many people ask my opinion on 2012. What do I think will happen? My personal opinion is don't believe all the hype. The hype - as in the world is coming to an end. Granted someday it will - but not for a very long time. What I think will happen is a shift in consciousness. Instead of being more greed, material - earth bound based -- it'll be more spiritual, love, accepting based. I also feel at this time, what crystal skulls haven't already been awoken - will wake up. The skulls will help the shift.

On a completely separate adult note: when I stopped my sex radio show & podcast - I took down the adult store that went with them. Well, I just revamped it making it better than ever with a lot of products: http://www.thepassionzone.com/ I have no idea it's you if you buy. So no worries!

I just remembered the other night - when I lost my site Gypsy Girl Press, I lost the years of data that I saved in regards to Bill and Ted - mainly Bill. All gone. I had saved it all on the GGP server thinking it would be safe. SIGH. If we were ever to sit down and talk - I don't have any notes/dates to compare to him.

I had two readings at the ULE - both psychics picked up on Vincent. Oh yes they did. If (though his free will) he's going to show up in my life at all during this lifetime - it'll be before the end of this year. It was amazing how they both described him to a "T". I'm always open to the possibilities.

Vincent did visit me the other night for a fun dream visit! I wrote about it in the OBE blog.

Better get going. Need to do a few readings, my podcast, laundry, write a paper and carve some pumpkins!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie ;)

Thomas, Mark and Will!

I felt a big urge to write in here tonight - even though I am really tired. I labored on Labor Day:) I can feel that shift coming - and it's going to be a doozy. In part it has to do with my financial situation - but it's more than that - a lot more. Not all bad, just stressful because I'm not a big one for change.

There's someone new who has been showing up in my visions. His name is Mark - well, it's actually Thomas, but he goes by Mark. He's been around for years (since 1979) and like when I would see Will or Bill (both from the mid 1980's) - I would push this aside - not giving it much thought. But now - I'm not given a choice but to give him thought.

Mark is very intuitive. He also has a guru or someone he talks to on a regular basis to get a handle on his visions. Like him with me - I have been popping up with him. He's all the way in CA - so the odds of me running into him are slim. Because the odds are slim - I wonder why the connection has been activated (so to speak)?

Mark is like Vincent in the respect that he is a protector. There's no way in the universe that he (or Vincent) would allow anything to harm me. I can see him in past lives with me - either as a warrior (knight, police officer) or as a mystic.

About this time of year is when someone new - and important - pops into my psychic life. It's like they get an inkling on me 1st - and then seek out answers to what's going on. That's when they happen upon my site and then I'm drawn into the mix.

Mark and Will happen to know each other with Will not liking Mark like Bill does not care for Will. SIGH.

What I wish is that the universe would stop introducing new players into this soul group/past life bunch and instead let me sit down for a face to face with the ones I know about. I mean hell - I know they stop by the site and keep an eye on me - and they know I know. So what the hell? Someday this would make a hell of a movie.

Last week I had a very nice dream visit with Will. He was in a theatre. I was pulled into his dream, not the other way around. He was watching someone on the big screen. I told him that one of the things I like about him - his ability to be complex, multi talented. He starts yelling at the scream calling the person up there an idiot & a waste of talent. Will turns, cups my face and kisses me - that's one of the reasons he loves me, he said, because I put up with him. He and I sit in the very comfortable seats. He decides to go get something to drink. There's now a movie on screen (no idea what). When he comes back - he doesn't sit by me, instead he goes two rows behind me and hands the drink to the woman who is right behind me. I turn and look at him - WTF? He's like - I didn't know you wanted this. I give him the "whatever jack ass" look and turn back around. He sits next to me and apologizes - I tell him to keep quite, I hate it when people talk during a movie (which I really do). Then I woke up. No idea about this dream - it happened the night after my visit with Bill and Ted.

Right before I woke up this morning - in my dream I was passing a man who was sitting at a student's desk (like the ones I see at college). He had his head in his hands - he was just beside himself. I asked him if Capital One was harassing him (like they are me in real life) he said yes - they won't leave him alone. He looked so torn. I thought to myself - this is Thomas (not to be confused with the Mark/Thomas from above). I don't know why this name popped up - but I knew that I was supposed to remember him. He was a big guy - good looking - older than me by a couple of years with hazel eyes. I grabbed a canister of film (as from a 35 mm camera) and said - nothing in life lasts forever - this too shall pass. I smiled at him and walked away. When I said it - I felt at peace -- he looked at me - smiled and nodded his head. I woke up.

Vincent has been around a lot too lately. Not sure if he's protecting me from Mark or what. But he's hovering. Feels like a big ole blanket wrapped around me.

And on that note - it's time for me to go to bed.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

Happy Birthday Ted!

Today Ted is 50 - Happy Birthday to him! This week has been a crazy week - just like last week and the week before that. I'm exhausted. So much so that I forgot to say Happy Birthday to Michael on the 14th - he turned 41. I didn't forget it was his b-day - I just forgot to say it.

I'll be out of town Sat & Sun - I have so much to do that I really need to stay home - but I really don't have a choice. So......I'll suck it up and go. Eventually I'll be able to tell you guys what I'm up to. I thought I could by now -- but alas - just like most things right now it hasn't gone as I planned.

I think what I'm going to stop doing is planning. Cause if you really think about it - it's not up to me. The day to day stuff is - but the overall plan isn't. I wonder if I'll finally be on one to one talking to Bill or Ted by the time I turn 50? I was thinking the other day - it's been 7 years since I discovered Bill, 6 for Ted, I think 3 for Will and 1 for Vincent. Or maybe it's 4 for Will and 2 for Vincent?

Lately my attention jumps back and forth between Vincent and Bill. For some reason Bill's energy is always laughing - as in happy laughter and Vincent stands there with that grin on his face. He doesn't say anything - do anything - he just grins. Michael just hangs around.

I haven't gotten anywhere with BT or OBE all week. It's been very disheartening. The bug field trip with my son's class went well. I was the ONLY parent there out of the whole 2nd grade. I couldn't believe it. My son and I were doing well until we got to the bug-eating part. Couldn't do it. There were live bugs, fried bugs and chocolate covered bugs. Just no way.

I am so tired -- heading to bed.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

Making Amends, To-Do List and Subconsious Reality!

I swear I have no idea where my day went. Granted, today was running errand day. I still have one more stop - but it'll have to wait till Friday. It was a nice sunny day here in Ohio and I figured - why not? Besides - was sooooo tired of sitting at my computer. I also worked on my college financial aid forms and my scholarship applications.

I've used a good portion of brain power on my "to do" list which as I told you guys - I'd be accountable for here in the blog. Working on the BT I have hit a road block that I have to find a way through. The original plan in the script was to have an SS officer and a gypsy woman leave the camp in search of something by orders of Mengele. But the powers that be think it's too far fetched - so I have to have all of the action that I had on the various trips confined to the concentration camp. I've been studying Birkenau for hours -- going over maps - looking at buildings. I have to have an idea of what I'm going to write - and then I'll fill in the details as I'm writing. But I can't find that overview to start with......I have 1 month until this script is due and I have to have it done. I know I'll figure it out - but in the meantime it's unsettling.

That said -- I was able to work out a couple of scenes that I want to add. So that was cool. OBE I got no where with. I just ran out of time.

For those of you who voted in the Start-Up Nation contest - thank you. Winners will be announced in May. Fingers crossed.

My dreams are still really out there - and so *&^% busy. I mean WTF? On top of it I can't remember a dang thing. I asked Ethan why can't I remember when I'm usually pretty good at it. He told me the good stand by "You're not supposed to know". I sighed - I couldn't help myself. He told me that if I consciously knew everything my subconscious knew - then I'd be overwhelmed and I'd shut down. The nice thing about a subconscious he said is that it has no distinction between the physical realty and the other worlds/dimensions. So it operates under the assumption that what is going on in the subconscious is your reality. Hence why the thought process and habits are a huge part of our reality. Humm...if I could get my subconscious to believe that I was actually in a physical reality friendship with Bill, Ted, Vincent and Will - would my reality shift to accommodate the world that my subconscious lives in? Or would my subconscious and reality be at war with one another - thereby creating a hell of a lot of inner turmoil?

I must admit - there's a small part of me, I'm ashamed to say, is convinced that I'm not supposed to be in any kind of relationship with anyone in my soul cluster in this lifetime. If that is indeed the case - I must of really screwed up in past lives in regards to these guys to have this happen now. In order to make amends (if there are any to make) would I have to do it in person by having a physical relationship with them? Or could I make amends via our energy fields & souls? Would that heal whatever it is we're stuck in? I should be asleep - but I'm up pondering these things.

I mentioned to Ethan that I have not seen or felt Andrew in along time. He said that Ethan is off working with Vincent. He does stop in daily to see how I'm doing - but Vincent really needs him right now. I'm thinking it's time for some chick power: Iris, Jezell and Brigit. As soon as I typed that I heard Ethan say I was crazy - lol. So what's his point?

Seeing that I will be a pain in everyone's rear end if I do not get to sleep - I'd better scoot.

Samatha and AJ - how did you do on your projects today?

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)