Allie's Two Cents

Personal Intuitive Advisor and Syndicated Columnist "Ask Allie", two cents on metaphysical topics: soul mates, astral sex, telepathic communications, healing, divination, astral travel, dreams, etc..., writing and her spiritual progress.

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Wednesday, March 17, 2010

The Guys, A New Guide and Attachments!

I'm tired today - but not as bad as I've been. Last night I slept like a semi-rock. I say semi because I don't think I've slept like a "rock" without waking up at some point since 1996 or so. Any ways - I think it's in part to the question I had asked about Bill - I got my answer.

My Question: Will Bill honor our soul agreement in this lifetime?

Monte's Answer: I feel that he's on a different path than you are and even though he loves you, I don't see that meaning that your path and his will be be forever...not in a relationship of love...but more of a Spiritual kind-ship...He's not satisfied with his life right now and wants more than you do so he's looking a lot more down the road....You're looking more in the now and you both need to be looking at what life offers for each of you along the same path, not what you get versus what he gets....What I'm saying is; Your priority should be to want the same thing or negotiate them to a conclusion so you each know what's most important.

My Response: Unfortunately for Bill and I the balls in his court and has been for the last 5 years. I have no way to contact him in the physical realm - but he stops by my blog to check in on me and he has my phone number. There's so much more we could accomplish for the world together than separate. It's frustrating. Especially since I know he's not satisfied with his life and he's looking for more. The nightly dream and daily telepathic contact is nice but....

Monte's Answer: ***This is holding you back as an attachment so 'Let Go, Let GOD', everything has a purpose so don't allow this BIG issue of yours distract you from where you need to be Spiritually....I do understand and feel your frustration at the lack of of an acceptable reason for Bill to be with you on your path, but he has work to do before he can accept a partner in his life just as you have your work to do....Release him with love and let Guidance take it from there...

He went on to tell me about his experience which was similar to mine. He told me about removing attachments and because of that one of his guides left and a new one arrived. This got me to thinking -- I haven't had a new guide in a very long time. Maybe before my divorce. Before I got divorced, I must of been doing some major growth because I had a lot of guides come and go.

Last night I decided to ask the universe to remove anyone or anything from my life that wasn't for my highest good. When I went to sleep I felt lighter. I don't remmeber Bill or Will being in any of my dreams.

In the shower this morning I remembered something that Monte said - he consciously removed the attachments. So as I was rinsing off I brought to me each of the guys - said "Go in peace, do what you have to do, and then come back." Next was my 2 exes. For them I said:  "Go in peace and never come back." Each one I sent out into a brilliant white light. All of them were rather easy to let go of but Ted. My heart chakra felt heavy, then had a vibration and a tug. He looked horrible as I let him go - but I knew I had to.

As soon as the last one was gone - some of my current guides took a bow and left: Ethan, Edward and Robert (all 3 said they would be back at some time) and Iris (who said she's not coming back). Then I heard a high pitch sound and saw a very vibrant golden light. I heard a female voice say that she was here now. I recognized the energy immedately from a past life regression I had 3 or 4 years ago. If I could figure out how to transfer the regression session from a cassette tape to here I would. Anyways -- in the regression session this soul/light came through me to talk to Cindy (the regressionist). This light was part of my star past.

I asked her name. She said it was a sound - close to what we could say is a "C". She told me to give her a name if it made it easier. So I called her Gloria. She told me I was one of the Star Children - Ted and I. This was something I already knew. Then she said that my son is also a Star Child - he was Ted and I child - and becaue he is a star like me, it's one of the major reasons he and I butt heads. His soul is almost as old as mine and like me - he's a leader not a follower.

Gloria then went on to say that I sabatage myself because I'm not like everyone - and I want to be like everyone. So I do what I have to in order to remain - normal. Well as normal as I can be :) She then showed me a diagram...went something like this:


STAR PEOPLE (1% of all souls)

                               MOST OF THE SOULS (98% of all souls)

                                                                        DARK SOULS (1 % of all souls)

She went on to explain that if I deny who I am - then the scale tips in the Dark Soul's favor. Especially since Ted and my son have no clue about their light - yet.

I asked if we're all stronger when we're connected - then did I do the wrong thing by releasing the attachments to the guys? She said no. Even though on the physical plane the attachments were cut, on the spiritual plane we're all connected. On the physical plane they were (unconsiously) draining the light from me. In order for me to "shine" then I have to refuel and allow my light to shine through. When the guys are all strong enough on their own - that means they completed their tasks - and they will all be back (with the exception of the exes, of course).

I ran a few plans past Gloria and she liked them. When I go to impliment them into GA or OBE, I'll let you guys know:) Since our convo this morning - she is off my right side - the light is constant and strong. I know there was much more said during our talk, but right now I don't remember all of it.

Off to the side of the blog I put links to my Twitter page and my new Facebook page.

It feels nice to be writing in the blog again.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Monday, March 15, 2010

Bill, Will and Vincent!

I have a headache. I think it's from the lack of good quality sleep. Once my head hits the pillow I'm out. But it's not a resting sleep. Oh no. I have to keep traveling. The dream visits I had last night seem to be a continuation of the dream where I couldn't find my physical body. There were three of us in a room - I think it was me with Bill and Will -- and our astral bodies were standing over our physical bodies - that were laying on green slabs of rock? Maybe concrete? We couldn't get back into our bodies. We felt so heavy - like lead. I still can feel the panic I felt. None of us knew what to do. We knew that there was someone in another room that wanted something with us. It was important for us to get back into our bodies, so that we could wake up and get the heck out of there. Bill and Will were arguing on what to do. I kept trying to tell them that if we worked together we'd all get back in. But they wouldn't listen. They were both too wrapped up in being "right". I was so frustrated that I screamed and screamed until I woke up. I then laid there pissed off. Damn those two. I just know that this is going to come back again and again until we get back into our bodies.

Last night I also heard Iris talk about Vincent again and how he's supposed to be the one. I asked her to stop talking about him. If it was that dang important for him to be in my life - then he'll get here - but I'm not going out of my way. She'd tried telling me that I have to go out of the way. Something about me being the light and all. SIGH. I'm not sure what to think about all this. I know that whenever I get a reading from someone - they always pick up on Vincent. Always. But then they can't tell if it's actually supposed to be Vincent or someone who is like Vincent. I'm open to whomever the universe sends me.

I got my Census 2010 in the mail today. In big bold letters it says "Your Response Is Required By Law." Oh really? What's going to happen if I don't return it? Is the gov't going to spend more of our tax dollars on the Census police? I just shake my head.

There have been some strange happenings going on here while I'm wide awake. I don't know if you remember a year or two ago, I would have a black mist/energy/spirit show up in my office. Same thing again. But this time with the shadow - I also have flashes of light. Everything is right in the corner of my eye - I look - and it's gone. It happens all over my house - but in my office it's the worse. I'm not scared or anything - I just wonder who it is - and what do they want?

Gimli has been seeing a ghost in my neighbor's house. Gimli will sit outside of Bob's house and just wag his tail like crazy looking at his house. He paces - barks - looks around the side of the house -- all when Bob isn't home. I think that it kind of freaks Gimli out because I've had a hell of a time getting that dog to go outside to the bathroom. He just stands and stares at the house.

Time to get ready for bed. I'm exhausted.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Friday, March 12, 2010

Bill, Dreams and Astral Travel

Bill. This man. Double super SIGH. Okay, so I've mentioned before that he is in my dreams every night. Now we don't always interact in the dreams. Most times one of us is in the background of the other's dream. I know - strange huh? But when we do interact, the dream stands out vividly. The other night my dream took me to my next door neighbor Bob's house. Now Bob in reality has a very big tutor house that he lives in all by himself. In the dream somehow our houses were connected. All we had to do was slide a door over and we could wall to and from the houses (like connecting rooms in a hotel).

Bob's house was under construction. He was cutting the ties with my house and making us have two separate structures with a driveway in between (how it actually is).

So I'm in his house looking up at this massive staircase in the center of his entry foyer. I look over to my right and there's Bill. He's in a t-shirt, jeans with a tool belt. I remember thinking to myself -- should I talk to him? If I do, should I act like I know him or act like a stranger? I decided on being friendly with him -- I figured hell, he's in my dream.

I asked how he's been. He tells me that he's been stressed. That's why he's here - to help out and hopefully burn off some of the stress he's carrying inside. We talked about what a nice house Bob has - Bill comments that someday he'd like to buy it. I say - of course - that means you'd live next door to me. He smiles and replies - I know.

The house is crawling with construction workers. I asked Bill if I could show him a wall that needs fixed. Next thing I know we're in my staircase and I'm showing him where the floor the closet (which is the closet in my office) has buckled out the wall. He agrees this is a problem (in real life this is a problem). He wants to see my closet.

As we go into my office I think to myself - Oh God, those two portraits of Bill and Ted are up, I wonder if he'll see them? Sure enough - he glances over by my desk and spies the pictures of him and Ted. He walks over and say - OMG - you're the one who had these drawn? And I say yes - did you like them? He said that he loved his. (note: in real life I did have 2 spirit portraits drawn of Bill and Ted - and sent to them. No copies are in my office).

I ask -- when are you going to get off your ass and honor our soul agreement? He replies - I don't know if I can. Bull shit - I say - you can do anything you want to. You're just a chicken shit like Will. Unbelievable - two men who really do not like one another in this life yet you two are both too scared of the possibilities. For the record - I think you're both a pain in the butt and I wouldn't want to be involved with either of you. But I do think that we could do a lot more good for the world together than separate.

What does he say to that? You belong to Vincent in this life. The look I gave him made him take a step back (must of been the evil PMS I'm gonna whip your ass look) and I yell - I belong to no one, I don't care what life I'm in.

Then I made myself wake up. Why oh why does he drive me insane? After I had this dream, I contacted a psychic I didn't know - never met - but came highly recommended and asked him if Bill is ever going to live up to our soul agreement. I'll let you know what he says. Because quite honestly I'm curious -- if you make a soul agreement with someone, can you use free will to brake that agreement? Or does it happen no matter what? I think I will talk about soul agreements in Monday's podcast.

I found a cool way to force myself to concentrate: when you're feeling rather spacey or scattered, take a nice white ball of light, have it enter your head via your third eye. Let the ball of light bounce around inside your head for a spell. It's more important to feel the ball of light moving about than to "see" it. When you feel more "crystal clear" have the ball exit your back - third eye chakra (aka back of your head).

The dream I had last night also incorporated astral travel. It was a whacked out experience. In my dream I hurt my leg. Well I should say that my leg was hurt so bad that I was being rushed into surgery in order to save it from being cut off. I was crying hard as they wheeled me into the OR. They wanted to give me drugs to put me to sleep so that they could operate. I told the nurse that if I fall asleep my soul is going to get lost. She thought I was silly and proceeded to put me under.

I felt my astral body pop out of my physical body. Off to the right I saw a light and went towards it. This was not the light of heaven, but a light to another dimension. As I was moving to the light - I looked over and saw my son and my mom & sisters waiting out in the waiting room. My son all of a sudden jumps up and tells me to come back.

I'm in the light and come out in Atlantis. It is so peaceful. I walk around talking to people. I asked where is Bill and Ted - they say they are not here, but Will is looking for me. I go off towards a temple and find Will on the steps. I ask him what he's doing here. He replies that he was waiting for me. I ask if he was hurt too? He says no.

In the background I can hear faint voices from the hospital. Something about me not waking up. Will tells me it's time to go back. I tell him no - I like it here. He says - in time. Now go home. I say no.

The next thing I know I'm off in some sort of white haze. I'm telling anyone who will listen that I've lost my way. I can't find my way back to my body. They keep telling me to think of my body and I'll go back. I keep trying and it's not working. I begin to panic.

In the background I hear my alarm go off. Next thing I know I'm falling, I slam back into my body and I turn off my alarm. I laid in bed for awhile trying to make sense of it all - and I couldn't.

For the next week I'm on spring break (YAY ME). During this time I'm going to start to tackle my gobs of email. And wow - do I mean gobs. I'll eventually get back to all of you - be patient:)

Have a wonderful weekend!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Sunday, December 27, 2009

A Little Bit of This, That and the Other Thing.

Well hi there! Long time no talk. I hope everyone is having a happy holiday season. Thank you for all of the holiday messages that arrived in my inbox, FaceBook and here on the blog.

Humm....where should I even start with this update? Better grab a cup of coffee and get settled in -- I have a lot to chat about.

College - ended up getting 3 A's and 1 B+. Landed on the Dean's List again (yay me)! Classes are out until Jan 10th. Another year of full time classes and I should have my BA by this time next year.

I'm also going to be enrolled in the Sex Coaching Instutite. I know - I know -- seriously, how much can I cram into a day? No worries as my son is going back to his public school on Jan 4th. He had to realize that being with me all day long was not a good thing. I'm a lot more strict than the teachers. Now that he realizes that being with mom is not the best thing in the world, he won't act up (on purpose mind you) in school so that I have to take him out and homeschool him. Fingers crossed that my plan has worked:)

Brodie has had some really rough days. I feel horrible for him - but he doesn't want to give up yet - so I'm not putting him down for the time being. Gimli on the other hand is eating my house one piece at a time. The carpet, wooden floor, couches....SIGH. He's just luckly I love animals.

My dreams have been so active and really messed up lately. This has been going on the last 6 months or so - but over the last 2 months it's really intensified. In my dreams I'm working for a secret gov't agency. We interagate people in their dreams. Now I'm good at shifting my dreams when I want or need another dream enviroment. But with this - I bounce right back to gov't work. I'm very good at what I do for the agency and I'm told (in the dreams) that I'm not going to be going anywhere any time soon. I'm too valuable. SIGH. So I've bene waking up just as tired as when I fell asleep. When I try to shift the gov 't dreams - I keep landing in Atlantis. All I want to do is stay there - but even Atlantis can't keep me in Atlantis.

The bathroom dreams are also back. Big rooms full of toliets with no walls - hundreads of people around going to the bathroom. But  this time in these dreams - I find the one private bathroom there is -- and everytime I enter I'm told that this is where I belong. Seperate - yet connect - to the world.

Now - in the waking world it's also been very interesting concerning Atlantis. I could be in the middle of something (like driving) and all of a sudden Atlantis is there. I'm not "in" it - but I can reach out and grab it (so to speak). It happens all the time now - even when I'm in the middle of a conversation. I have to stop what I'm saying (I loose my train of thought completely) and restart. The last couple of weeks it's been really intense.

The reason it's so intense - I think - is that an old friend has come back into my life. This is a friend that I'd walk through fire for in a heart beat - but everytime we've been together (in the past) he has broken my heart in a million pieces. I have a wall so thick around me where it concerns him (and really anyone else who has hurt me) that it's difficult for him to get through. BUT -- he has an abundence of spiritual gifts that are just fabo - and he can still break through this fortress without even really trying. He's come to me for help in understanding his gifts. Like me - he's a logical thinker by nature - and he's trying to logically figure this out (something Bill has been trying to do for years). There's no logic to this -- I've tried.

In order for me to really help him, I have to let my walls down completely. I know this - he knows this. Iris is being very forward about me doing this -- that I have to. I know I have to -- but I'm scared. He can get to places within me that no one else but Bill can. The difference my friend wants to be in those places where Bill has said no way.

So anyways my friend - Kevin - thinks he's Vincent. He's not - but what is so interesting about him saying Vincent out of all of the men I'm connected to is that at the ULE I got a couple of readings. All described Vincent as being in my energy - but it wasn't Vincent. It was someone LIKE Vincent. Someone with the same protective energy as Vincent - someone who can love me in ways that no one else can. So is Kevin the Vincent that the readers mentioned? I try to figure it out, but I know I can't figure it out. I have to go with the flow and see where I land.

Kevin says that I have an enormous power within me -- like he does (I said the like he does - he didn't say that) -- that has to be tapped into. I'm only skating on the surface. By allowing myself to be fully immersed in my gifts - I can help more people (which is what I love to do).

I can feel the guys closing in ranks around me - not wanting to let Kevin close to me. Between my wall and the guys - it should be damn near impossible for Kevin to get through - yet he still does. Since I saw Kevin last night - I can't stop the energy tremors. What he and I need to do (I feel) is spend some time alone without the outside pressures of life - if only for a day. This way we can get a handle on what's going on.

I'll try to keep you updated.

Starting at the start of the year, I will no longer be offering free follow up questions for the readings. I just cannot keep up with them all. I'll talk about it more in today's podcast.

Also in the last couple of weeks I started to watch (and got caught up with) Heroes. I was going to watch it when it 1st came on TV - but my guides told me no - I wasn't ready. I wasn't sure what I had to be "ready" for -- but I think it has to do with the acceptance of who I am. The ability to focus in on my gifts and use them to make a difference in people's lives. I know that so far I've only scratched the surface on what I can do -- and it'll take a big leap of faith to see what else I'm capable of.

But isn't like that for most people? That we only scratch the surface of our possibilities - scared or fearful - to go outside of our comfort zone? To push our limits. When we push - when we tap into what we're capable of -- our world changes. It can't help but change. For the most part people just do not like change. It doesn't matter if it's you that doesn't like the change or the people around you don't want you to change - if you change then you push them outside their comfort zone.

I'm going to be making some more changes in 2010 (I think). No more Gypsy Magic or Gypsy News blogs. I'll leave them there but no updates. No more monthly Numerscope. OBE blog, this blog and the podcast stays.

Major changes to the OBE site on the horizon. I can't tell you about it now - but will as soon as I can. I know you'll like the changes:)

Mercury is in retro until Jan 15th. 

I know there's more to update you on -- but I have dogs that need to go outside.

Hope all of you have a wonderful and safe New Years Eve. Here's to a loving - prosperous 2010 for all of us!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Sunday, October 25, 2009

Bill, Universal Light Expo and Updates!

Hi Everyone!

I didn't forget - Bill turned 51 on October 20th! I thought about him for most of the that day. He is still such a sex - sexy man. Good thing I have an eternity to meet up with him. Until then we'll keep meeting up in the dream state. When he's in the US we dream visit nightly. If he's traveling around the globe (which is what he usually does) we still connect during the day. The connections are brief - just like a "Hey, how ya doing? Miss you. Ciao." But I'll take what I can get.

I know - it's been awhile since I posted anything. Sorry about that. But I did warn you that while classes are going on my postings would dwindle off - there just isn't enough time in the day for it all. Especially since now I've been allowed to be a part of a research team. Granted - I'm just an assistant and get to do all the low level stuff - but it looks good on my grad school application.
College is going fine -- homeschool with my son is a challenge, but we're getting there. If he would just realize that writing things is a needed skill in life. Not everything mind you - but you do have to use a pen/pencil to paper - probably daily. Until then he spends a lot of time being grounded and I'm stressed far more than I should be.

Brodie isn't doing very well. If you all could send him healing light - I would (and so would he) appreciate it. The tumor hasn't made his nose malformed yet. But he has a hell of a time trying to breathe and his nose bleeds are horrible. Hard to believe it's been a year since Indy passed away. Man I miss that dog - so does Brodie.

Brodie - more than money - is the reason I'm not doing Maria's Cosmic Convention next weekend. I refuse to be gone when Brodie dies. I still feel horrible about Indy passing away in that vet office without me there. I just can't let it happen again. So for all of you who are going to the Cosmic Convention - I'm sorry I won't see you. I hope to be able to go in May - as long as it jives with my finals schedule.

The Universal Light Expo was great. I met a lot of new people, saw many familiar faces. A few people came down from MI (and who I usually see at Maria's fairs) to see the expo - stopped by to say hi. It was fabo to see them all. I had a family from Romania (who lives in Cleveland) stop by. They drove down specifically to see me. That was really nice of them. I sold a lot of books - did many readings - a very good weekend in all.

BTW - for all of you who have emailed or called to see how I'm doing because I haven't posted in a while or did a podcast - your thoughts and concerns were/are very appreciated!

The last several months I've had my feelings really hurt by a couple of people who I thought were my friends. One person I told everything to - everything - and that is not a easy thing for me to do. I'm usually very guarded and tell people & my friends only the parts that I know they'd want to hear or that they can grasp (if that makes sense). So very few people have ever known all of me - in fact - I can count on one hand how many (with fingers left over). Everyone of these people ended up stabbing me in the back one way or the other. It sucks. But since I'm in a 9 Personal Year - those people, places and things that are not in my highest good drift away. So in a way it's good. But it still sucks. Sucks even more that I miss them. But I don't allow myself a lot of "missing" time. That heart chakra of mine just keeps getting stepped on. Sheesh. I want it opened up and accepting - not closed off and defensive. Onward and upward!

Love life is still zero. I haven't found anyone that even peeks my interest a bit. Had a neighbor that did - but he moved and we could never find time to connect.

I stopped screenwriting. My heart just isn't in it any longer. I'm tired of my ideas sucking or my writing being less than desirable. Eventually I'll work on The Black Triangle again - because I know I have to - it's a Destiny Marker for me.

Of course Will was a Destiny Marker for me (and I for him) and we saw how well that worked out. Like with Bill - Will and I have eternity. But I would like to cross some things off my list.

Even though I'm not posting here in the blog or doing podcasts often - that doesn't mean I'm not doing readings. I've allotted myself time every week just for that. So please keep me in mind for your reading needs:)

I've had many people ask my opinion on 2012. What do I think will happen? My personal opinion is don't believe all the hype. The hype - as in the world is coming to an end. Granted someday it will - but not for a very long time. What I think will happen is a shift in consciousness. Instead of being more greed, material - earth bound based -- it'll be more spiritual, love, accepting based. I also feel at this time, what crystal skulls haven't already been awoken - will wake up. The skulls will help the shift.

On a completely separate adult note: when I stopped my sex radio show & podcast - I took down the adult store that went with them. Well, I just revamped it making it better than ever with a lot of products: http://www.thepassionzone.com/ I have no idea it's you if you buy. So no worries!

I just remembered the other night - when I lost my site Gypsy Girl Press, I lost the years of data that I saved in regards to Bill and Ted - mainly Bill. All gone. I had saved it all on the GGP server thinking it would be safe. SIGH. If we were ever to sit down and talk - I don't have any notes/dates to compare to him.

I had two readings at the ULE - both psychics picked up on Vincent. Oh yes they did. If (though his free will) he's going to show up in my life at all during this lifetime - it'll be before the end of this year. It was amazing how they both described him to a "T". I'm always open to the possibilities.

Vincent did visit me the other night for a fun dream visit! I wrote about it in the OBE blog.

Better get going. Need to do a few readings, my podcast, laundry, write a paper and carve some pumpkins!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie ;)

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Thursday, September 10, 2009

Mark, Karma and Iris!

I was going to write about Mark last night -- but by the time I got done with my work it was 2:30 am. I was pooped. I still am.

Tuesday night's dream continued into Wednesday's nights visit. Mark and I were sitting at a picnic table - one in the middle of a park. No one was around. he and I were drinking black coffee -- it was very strong as if it was brewed a week ago and it just sat there until we drank it. I remember thinking that he and I needed this leaded coffee so that we could keep going -- the difficulties are before us.

Mark asked me how to stop the train. I told him that everything was already in motion and there was no stopping things. He sighed - looked really sad - and said that he wished things would be different. That he didn't have to go through the pain he will have to endue in order for him to move forward in this life. He added that he was happy that I was the one who would help him through this -- and in return he would fix his karmic debt to me. I asked him what had happened in the past in order for him to have this karmic debt -- and this must be a major debt as he needs to clear it in order not to have to come back as a human. He smiled (he has the most amazing smile I have ever seen) and said - yeah, I fucked up a few times. With me - I asked? Unfortunately he replied. What did you do? (I just had to know). I don't have a clue - was his reply to me. I wish I could remember. The thing is Al (he called me Al) is that in order for me to fix the past, you have to open up and let me in. Can you do that? I stared at him - slammed my hands on the table -- woke up.

Last night it continued.....

Mark's at my house -- he's looking around -- you need new carpet - new furniture - and a different car. I nod and say it'll all come eventually. He replied - let me get it for you. I answered - no. Al...he said...I have more money than I need....let me help you. Why? I asked. So I can owe you? No, he said, because I owe YOU.

So this is how you'll pay me back..with material crap? No - he cups my face in his hands - but it's a start. I turned from him and say that Brodie needs to go outside potty. He yelled at me -- don't shut me out. The dog and I go outside. Once outside Brodie was not there -- and I'm in the middle of a forest.

I turned around and Mark was there -- on the ground is a tent, camping equipment and a burning fire. You still like to camp - he asked? I turned away from him and was about to walk the opposite direction when he appeared in front of me.

I'm not Bill, Ted, Vincent...and I'm sure as hell not Will. I'm not them! I found you. Who do you think put the thoughts in your head for you to find me?

Yeah -- just like Will did -- and where did that get me?

NOT like Will -- it took you months to figure out that he was calling you - it took you a couple of weeks with me.

But you've been in my energy since 1979. A lot longer than Will or any of them. So actually - it took you 30 years. I turned again to get away from him and he grabbed my arm - yanked me to him.

I'm not one of the bad guys.

Time will tell -- I yanked my arm away.

All of a sudden this blast of light and wind made us both stumble -- it was blinding.

Iris!

Stop acting like children! Mark -- you need Allie and Allie you need Mark. Allie -- do you want to go through these same lessons with relationships - AGAIN? Mark -- do you want to live through the same pain that you are about to experience -- do you want to come back AGAIN?

More important -- do you want me as your guide AGAIN?

We stay silent.

Iris glared at both of us -- and fades from view.

I look at Mark - he looks at me. Without a second of hesitation - he grabbed me -- kissed me -- very soft - seductive -- very nice. He pulled back - smiled. I could hear an alarm in the background. He said -- it was time to wake up.

So we did.

Mark and our karma is going to be harder than I thought.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Tuesday, September 08, 2009

And Mark Rolls On...

I'm so tired -- it's almost midnight. But I had to write this post first.

On the way to classes tonight - I felt someone kick my chair as I was driving. Then that "person" touched my face. I FELT a hand rest on my right cheek. Like when a person cups your face before they kiss you - that's what it felt like - but only one hand, not two. I almost freaked out as I drove.

I'm like -- who in the hell was that? Mark's blue eyes popped right in front of me - then his wicked smile. Andrew & Paul show up and I asked -- where in the hell have you two been? Andrew said they are working with Vincent. I asked what about my love life?

That's when Ethan stepped up and said it's bigger than your love life. So I say - WTH does that mean?

That's when Iris stepped forward and said - I'm back! Oh no -- heavy stuff happens when she's around! So I have to ask.....was that Mark who was in the car? Iris gives me that "look" like I just said something really stupid. Yes she replied. And - I ask - what does he (or you for that matter) have to do with me now?

Iris said - I told you I'd be back when something major was going to happen -- and here we are. So what does Mark.....I'm his guide too - Iris jumped in.

Oh Lord I said.

You two have work to do - she said.

What about Will? Bill? Ted? She waved her hand - they blew it - wasted their chance. Next life we'll get caught up.

So -- what kind of work do Mark and I have to do? All you need to know is that it's karmic and necessary so that Mark does not have to come back in human form - ever - unless he wanted to of course. Then Iris chimed in...why anyone would choose to be human is beyond me.

SIGH.

So we'll see what tonight brings if I can ever get to sleep to dream visit with him.

Night Night!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie ;)

PS: Iris means big change (whine - whine - sob - sob)!

PPS: Iris didn't mention anything about Vincent missing his chance - whoo hoo.

PPPS: She also didn't say that Bill, Ted and Will couldn't be friends with me - or that we'd never speak again in this life - just that they @ucked up and our work together will have to wait.

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Quick Dream With Mark

Ok - so Mark was in most of my dreams last night. I know this because I kept waking up and thinking - there he was again. Of course I didn't write any of it down - I was too tired all I wanted to do is go back to sleep.

What I do remember though is him being very agitated. Change was all around him and he wasn't happy about it at all. He was stressed. He slid behind the wheel of a moving truck - I was in the passenger seat. I knew that because he was pissed that I should put my seat belt on and I did. He didn't. He drove like a crazy man - way too fast, taking corners at a dangerous speed. Then he slowed down and went at a crawl - not wanting to get to his destination. He looked at me and said - I can't stop this...what do I do?

Then I woke up.

When he spoke to me - he had this tortured look on his face - like someone who is about to lose a loved one to an illness and they are powerless to stop it. His energy has been with me since I rolled out of bed.

Off to take Brodie to the vet - then it's time for my son's schooling.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Monday, September 07, 2009

Thomas, Mark and Will!

I felt a big urge to write in here tonight - even though I am really tired. I labored on Labor Day:) I can feel that shift coming - and it's going to be a doozy. In part it has to do with my financial situation - but it's more than that - a lot more. Not all bad, just stressful because I'm not a big one for change.

There's someone new who has been showing up in my visions. His name is Mark - well, it's actually Thomas, but he goes by Mark. He's been around for years (since 1979) and like when I would see Will or Bill (both from the mid 1980's) - I would push this aside - not giving it much thought. But now - I'm not given a choice but to give him thought.

Mark is very intuitive. He also has a guru or someone he talks to on a regular basis to get a handle on his visions. Like him with me - I have been popping up with him. He's all the way in CA - so the odds of me running into him are slim. Because the odds are slim - I wonder why the connection has been activated (so to speak)?

Mark is like Vincent in the respect that he is a protector. There's no way in the universe that he (or Vincent) would allow anything to harm me. I can see him in past lives with me - either as a warrior (knight, police officer) or as a mystic.

About this time of year is when someone new - and important - pops into my psychic life. It's like they get an inkling on me 1st - and then seek out answers to what's going on. That's when they happen upon my site and then I'm drawn into the mix.

Mark and Will happen to know each other with Will not liking Mark like Bill does not care for Will. SIGH.

What I wish is that the universe would stop introducing new players into this soul group/past life bunch and instead let me sit down for a face to face with the ones I know about. I mean hell - I know they stop by the site and keep an eye on me - and they know I know. So what the hell? Someday this would make a hell of a movie.

Last week I had a very nice dream visit with Will. He was in a theatre. I was pulled into his dream, not the other way around. He was watching someone on the big screen. I told him that one of the things I like about him - his ability to be complex, multi talented. He starts yelling at the scream calling the person up there an idiot & a waste of talent. Will turns, cups my face and kisses me - that's one of the reasons he loves me, he said, because I put up with him. He and I sit in the very comfortable seats. He decides to go get something to drink. There's now a movie on screen (no idea what). When he comes back - he doesn't sit by me, instead he goes two rows behind me and hands the drink to the woman who is right behind me. I turn and look at him - WTF? He's like - I didn't know you wanted this. I give him the "whatever jack ass" look and turn back around. He sits next to me and apologizes - I tell him to keep quite, I hate it when people talk during a movie (which I really do). Then I woke up. No idea about this dream - it happened the night after my visit with Bill and Ted.

Right before I woke up this morning - in my dream I was passing a man who was sitting at a student's desk (like the ones I see at college). He had his head in his hands - he was just beside himself. I asked him if Capital One was harassing him (like they are me in real life) he said yes - they won't leave him alone. He looked so torn. I thought to myself - this is Thomas (not to be confused with the Mark/Thomas from above). I don't know why this name popped up - but I knew that I was supposed to remember him. He was a big guy - good looking - older than me by a couple of years with hazel eyes. I grabbed a canister of film (as from a 35 mm camera) and said - nothing in life lasts forever - this too shall pass. I smiled at him and walked away. When I said it - I felt at peace -- he looked at me - smiled and nodded his head. I woke up.

Vincent has been around a lot too lately. Not sure if he's protecting me from Mark or what. But he's hovering. Feels like a big ole blanket wrapped around me.

And on that note - it's time for me to go to bed.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Thursday, August 27, 2009

Yes, I am still here.

College is great - but kicking my butt. My son's online public school is a pain in my tush to massive proportions. I'm looking forward to when he and I can get into a groove so that we don't kill one another.

I am in a major need to have you guys be my psychic pimps. Although I have jumped through all of the hoops that FirstMerit has put in my path - they threw another one at me in order for me to keep my house. I have 3 weeks to come up with $$$ so that my son and I can still live here. This is where you guys can come in -- I'm not asking for handouts, I'm asking for work. If you know of anyone who needs a reading, coaching or healing - please send them my way. My son, myself the 4 cats and the 1 dog (who I can't remember if I told you has sinus cancer) would greatly appreciate being able to stay in our home.

I know that I hear on TV and on the radio/web sites that banks are actively trying to help homeowners to stay in their home. Well, FirstMerit must not be one of those banks.

On another note - Bill and Ted have been in my dreams the last couple of nights. Both together with me - which is nice because they are usually separate when they visit. Must be to help me with my stress level before I have a heart attack or something -- cause let me tell you - my stress level hasn't been this high since I discovered my ex and his harem of girlfriends. I'm grateful that Bill and Ted are around.

I need to go get my son some lunch, then it's off to take Trouble (cat) to the vet and finally off to classes.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Friday, July 31, 2009

Ranting, Bill And A Visit From Grams P!

I'm on another rant - oh yes I am. What is it with these readers/psychics charging up to $39.99 a minute for their service? I kid you not -- $39.99 per minute! That's $2399.40 an hour -- an hour! I thought my previous WTF was outrageous at $20.00/minute. SIGH. I'm not sure what baffles me more - the balls of the readers/psychics to think they're worth that much or the clients need to pay them big bucks for peace of mind.

I've found myself completely unmotivated to do anything. Absolutely nothing interests me. I'm working on changing that as I can't stand just sitting here.

Gram P stopped by to say hi to my son and I. Lights all over the place were flickering - it was rather cool - my own light show. I'm glad she and I decided on this signal before she passed on. I've also been getting visits from my deceased friend Dave. The ex fireman is kind enough to make the smoke detector go off when he says hi. He really has to quit stopping by at 5:00 am. I know he gets a kick out of waking me up!

Bill stopped by last night for a dream visit. We were (of course) in a library. Very tall, deep dark wood bookcases lined the walls. Brass trim - big red leather chairs to sit in. He and I were discussing my college classes. I told him how I've been doing - he said he knew how well my classes went and that he was proud of me. I couldn't understand how he knew my grades. He smiled and said: Have you forgotten our connection? I always know what you're thinking. He turned around, grabbed a book and headed to another floor. I found him later in a corner chair with headphones on reading a book. I decided not to disturb him.

Off to go watch a movie with my son!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Sunday, June 28, 2009

I Know....I Know.....

Where in the &^%$# have I been? At the University of Akron - that's where. Finals week of Summer 1 was tough - but I pulled out 2 A's:) Now Summer 2 is really kicking my arse. I'm in classes 8 hrs a day 4x week (2 hrs on Friday) with almost 3 hrs of drive time each day. Geology is a pain - a lot of memorizing I have to do - and Western Humanities is interesting, but very long. At least there my tests are essay and we can use our notes.

My son turns 9 on July 1st. I can't believe it. He's gotten so darn big! Vincent's 50th b-day is on June 30th. Yesterday we had my son's party with his friends. They had a blast. 1st time my Mr. Hot Wheel got a chance to drive a go-cart. At first he was scared, but then he was a racin` fool!

I'm on Keen on the weekends & Friday nights. It seems to be working just fine this way. Sunday appears to be the best day for me to be on. With the way my schedule is - the Ask Allie podcast will be done on Friday's until Summer 2 is over at the end of July. In the current podcast - I have some pretty good Listener Appreciation deals going. Check them out!

Starting Tuesday I will be back as a weekly guest on the Maria Shaw show on Empower Radio. I'll be on right after the 1:00 pm break. I look forward to being back.

Remember KS? Well he has been around a lot more lately. He makes appearances in my dreams. During the day I can hear his voice - communications telepathically. Only with telepathy, his words are garbled. I'm not sure if it's me or him that's having a hard time. But during my school drive time I've been trying to hone in on him. It appears that he just wants to talk. He has a lot of questions about a multitude of things. One area that sticks out (came from a dream visit) is that he wants to know more about our past lives. Only problem there is that I don't know right now. I know there's a connection - but no clue as to the when and why of it all.

The rest of the guys are all around - have been. But they're just hanging back. Speaking of the guys, I came up with a great vampire story about me, Bill and Ted. But I have to get the horror story done 1st. Finding time to do it is challenging.

BTW - thanks to everyone who posted views/emailed me on the Robin & slaves dreams. Your $.02 helped.

Off to get my son up - then heading off to class!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Friday, June 05, 2009

Sawyer, a Robin and Slavery

So what do all three of those have in common? They were all dreams. The 1st two from me, the 3rd from my son.


Any dream with Sawyer in it (AKA Josh - and yes, that's Sawyer from LOST) is a good one. Even if we're fighting like siblings. This time around he and I are arguing about something stupid (the norm really), I hear "How in the hell should I know" coming from him - he has his back to me - and I grab his butt. We're talking a two handed, double squeeze. LOL. He turned around and gave me the dirtiest look and asked: "What the hell was that?" I shrugged my shoulders. He made this next point very clear: "That is off limits". I said "Ok, ok...I won't do it again. It's not like I wanted to sleep with you or anything. I just grabbed your ass." He smiled a bit, "I could scream sexual harassment." My reply with a smile, "Yeah right." Then I woke up.

This next one with the robin was disturbing. I'm on a highway - no idea where. When I pull over to the side of the road. There's no one around for miles. I'm in the middle of this 2 lane road when I look down and I see a robin staring up at me. It was stuck in the road - literally. I could see it's legs from the mid-shin up. Her feet were below the asphalt. I could see it sitting on the hot tar and sinking in - then the tar hardening. Cars and trucks ran over it every day - not thinking twice about a robin stuck in the road.

So I started to chisel away around it's feet. I'm wondering how this bird has stayed alive with no food, water and the sun beating down on her. I'm also curious if a car is going to run us both over as it comes around the curve. So I stop what I'm doing, move my car so that it's parked behind us with it's flashers on - this way people will hopefully go around (as opposed to plowing right into it). As I'm chiseling away at this asphalt - a woman shows up. No idea who she is - but I show her the robin and tell her what's going on. I chisel down all the way so that I can free the bird -- and she has this stickiness (reminded me of sap) on her feet/legs. She tries to spread her wings and falls right over on her side. I go and grab a pillow - me and this woman are going to lift the bird up and place it on the pillow. I'm scared to touch the bird, so this lady said she would. As she was going to move the bird, I was calling the Dept of Wildlife to find out where we should take it. I woke myself up at this point - because the image of the robin struggling to survive was too disturbing.

I have a mama and papa robin who come to my house every year and nest in my big pine tree. I like my robins. I have no idea what that dream meant. In the gypsy world - robin's bring good luck. But this robin was hurt -- and i had to really work to free her. Maybe it means that I have to work hard for luck to shine on me. But if that's the case - haven't I been doing that? I don't know.

Now this last dream about slaves, my son told me about yesterday morning. Before I go into the dream - a touch of background - my son (almost every stinken time I ask him to do something) has yelled at me that he wasn't my slave. He said it out of the blue once - never knew why he said it. When he told me about the dream - I kinda understand.

He said that he was a black child working in a coal mine. He had a Master. His job in the mine was to shovel all of the loose coal that landed on the floor and put them in the little track carts. He said that he didn't get hardly any food or rest. But his Master liked him - so he had a treat of candy every once in awhile. He was a very hard worker. That's really all he said about it - but I found it interesting.

I was on Keen last night - and was so disgusted with the amount of money I lost that I refused to log on tonight.

I'm soooooo tired. Heading off to bed.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Monday, May 04, 2009

My Birthday, The Passion Zone And A Dream!

What a weekend! Had a blast. It all started off on Friday when my son and I went to his school's carnival. Each class had to put together a themed basket to be raffled off. His class did reading. It was a really nice basket full of tons of good books. Guess what? My son won that basket. He (and his teacher) were so dang tickled:) He's never won anything before - so this was double great.

Saturday I went out with my mom during the day - went to on local restaurant for lunch - did some shopping (books - I'm a bookaholic) and then to another local restaurant for dessert, This dessert was sooooooo good. It was a dark chocolate cream custard thing (yeah, no clue on the name) that hit the spot. Then later that night my friend Sheri and I went shopping (yes, more books. Seriously, can you ever have enough?) then out for Mexican and margaritas! Back to Sheri's for movies and some more margaritas. Let's see we watched: Saw (I liked this one), Yes Man, Slumdog Millionaire and Appaloosa. It was a nice relaxing weekend.

Of course just a few seconds ago I realized that my car registration had expired - as it does on every birthday. But I still forgot. I didn't get to read any "If Today Is Your Birthday" horoscopes. I couldn't find any online. Maybe I wasn't looking in the right spot. But Maria Shaw said what you are doing on your solar return will set the theme for the following year (till the next birthday). This must be a good year then since I had a good birthday.

College classes start in 2 weeks. I signed up for World Civ - Middle East and the Psychology of Women for Summer 1. Summer 2 - no idea yet, but I'm thinking Sign Language 1 and Humanities in the Western Tra. I'm almost done with my gen ed (AKA piss ant requirements) - thankfully.

While I was spending the night at Sheri's house - I had a dream where I was running away from some bad guys. I'm in this house and I sneak out the back through a greenhouse to the back yard. When I get in the back - some search lights pop on and I see guns drawn on me - I stop. For some reason this didn't bother me - I think the guys with guns were there to help me. Any ways - when the lights popped on - who comes running towards me but my cat Darin. He does that -- if I'm not at home spending the night, he seeks me out in my dreams. I'm sure when I'm in Lansing this weekend he'll come see me again.

Which brings me to Maria Shaw's Cosmic Convention at the Hampton Inn off of Canal Rd in Lansing MI. I'll be there Friday - Sunday doing readings. On Friday the 8th from 4:30 - 6 I will be talking about:

"Your Chakras, Your Sex Life": How to attune your chakras so that you can have a vibrant and active life, translating that also in positive sexual energy. Sexual energy is one of the strongest vibrations we have. Learn how to harness, balance and work with your sixth chakra (sacral, sex) to improve many areas of your life, including lovemaking!

Please stop by the talk --- I'd really love it if I had a full house. I look forward to seeing everyone there -- I've met a great bunch of people in MI and I love going back to do these shows.

I want to thank all of you who stopped by The Passion Zone on Wednesday night on Empoweradio.com. Had fun. We skated over a few bumps in the 1st 15 min - but then it seems everything else flowed. My producer Jason - I have to think of a nickname for the guy. Don't forget to stop by this Wednesday - same time, same place. We'll be chatting about sex candy, dream sex and sexual positions. I'd appreciate if you told 10 of your friends about the show. Also if you know of anyone who'd be a good guest for the show, let me know - give me the link to their site. I'm looking for people who will talk about sex and/or relationships.

Watching SAW over the weekend gave me some good ideas about my horror script. I loved the ending - not something you would expect - which is what I loved - I liked to be surprised. It doesn't happen very often.

Last night Bill and Will were both dream visiting with me. I don't remember much - but with Will I had to act like I'd never met him before. Then I had to act like I didn't give a crap who he was. This was something that Will wanted. Bill asked me why - I said I didn't know. Bill mumbled a few words under his breath and walked away. He asked me to go with him - but I said I had to figure out what's wrong with Will. This ticked Bill off. I didn't mean to have him stomp off - but I couldn't just leave Will without trying to figure out why he was being so distant. I never did figure it out - I woke up. I had no problem ignoring Will, but it bothered me that I HAD to.

My son and I finally finished the last of The Dead Zone TV series. He was very upset that there is no more Johnny Smith. So he's acting out a new episode in his room -- I can hear him -- he's cute:) The way they left the Dead Zone - they could make a feature film and wrap things up.

I'd better get going -- I have some pre-planning to do for Wednesday's show.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Monday, April 06, 2009

Is It Keith or Kevin?

I hope I can remember most of my dream visit last night. I was with two other people in a car - a guy, girl and myself. We parked outside of a two story office building. The guy got out and mentioned that the empty store/office in front of us had bullet proof glass. I called him either Keith or Kevin - and said that he should rent the place and be a private investigator. Even though it was never said - I knew he was an ex police officer. He saw the woman who owned the building and went after her. I turned to the other girl in the car and mention that she could turn this into a sandwich shop. She mentioned something about what a sandwich shop is called in Brazil. I wish I could remember what she called it - I know it started with a "C". The shop we were at was a place where Kevin/Keith's friend had a business that went belly up.

Next thing I know - we're in a park. I find out that Kevin/Keith is Polish. He wanted to take me to a lake that is on church property. The lake was called Fast Lake. Keith/Kevin was about 6'2" broad shoulder - strong arms. His hair was short, blondish and in tight natural curls. He had on a yellow t-shirt and blue jeans. We got a long like we've known each other forever. I told him that he was not like anyone else I had ever met. He smiled and said - neither are you. There's a connection with his family and Birkenau. I don't know what - but there was something. There was also a mention about he and I meeting once I finished with BT. Not a clue on this dream - but I did wake up in a good mood.

Right before that dream, myself and a guy (have no idea who) were having a tour through this very elaborate house. A pool room was enormous - it was stupid big with a waterfall and all - which took us to the changing room - complete with private hot tub and sauna. Through the back changing room door was entrance to a private court yard. The previous owners lost all of their money and the house was foreclosed upon. It had something like 14 bedrooms, 25 bathrooms - 3 kitchens -- it was just HUGE! I have no idea why I was being shown around a massive place like that. Far too big for me!

My mom's cat Ben died today. He was a great cat - a mancoon. Ben was a stray that my mom came upon who had just been hit by a car and left for dead. That was 7 years ago. He lived to be 12. He cheated death many times - just like my Indy.

Working on a scene for BT. It's coming along well. Structured some OBE stuff. Nothing major - but I did do something with it:)

I did remember to post the podcast to iTunes today:)

I cannot believe that we're supposed to get 3 inches of snow tonight. I thought spring had sprung?

As I said today on the podcast - my heart goes out to those in Italy who were affected by today's earthquake. Tons of energy sent their way!

Off to make supper!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie ;)

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Monday, March 30, 2009

Being Accountable, A WTF Dream And Keen!

If you still haven't written me the letter explaining why you've used metaphysical/spiritual advice and why you need that genre of advice - you still have time. It doesn't even have to be advice - it can also be alternative healing, color therapy or Feng Shui. I need them by April 5th -- please!

Keen is going well - I've been on Mon - Fri. A minor miracle:) I find I do well being on 10 am - noon. And then depending what's going on 1 - 2:30. I'm trying to condition myself to do the sex advice at Ingenio (http://www.ingenio.com/Allie%20T) from 10 pm - midnight.

For whatever reason - my guides keep having me watch "Under The Tuscan Sun". I can't get what the message is. I'm thinking it's that my life is going to transform like the lead character Francine's did. Although I wasn't nearly as devastated with my divorce as she was hers. It could be a new start, maybe a trip to Italy (I wish), could be meeting an Italian man (boy do I really wish) - or even standing at a crossroads. I'm sure after the 10th time I watch it something should kick in:) At least I hope so.

If you sent me an email - I know it's here. No need to remind me.

My dreams have been really wild the last several nights. The dream that really stands out is the one from Sat night. I can remember being in a room with a bunch of people - we were discussing my life and lack of love life. I come across 3 guys - all of who I know , 2 I can't remember who they were - but the 3rd was Sawyer. He's pissed at me - he's holding his baby in his arms (in real life Josh and his wife either just had a baby or they are about to) I ask him what's the matter and he says, 'Visions - you have visions? You never told me that.' Before I could say WTF - the guy laying down on the beige couch said 'And she writes in the blog!' The 3rd guy shouts out 'For everyone to read!' I walked away perplexed at why it would shock them now. They all knew about everything. So then I started thinking that I should password protect the blog and only give the password out to people who ask. This way I'll know who is reading the posts. But another thought popped in and said - but Bill, Will and Vincent won't be able to read it then - they'll never ask for the password.

SIGH - I woke up.

I'm having a difficult time coaching myself. I have a huge list of things that I have to do and I can't get anything done because the list is too big. I'm trying to prioritize - but for me it's difficult to do if everything that is on my list should have been done already. Maybe I should go with what is nagging at me the most - besides the scholarship applications I have to finish. That would be Black Triangle and the OBE book. BT has to be rewritten by May 1st so that I can enter it in 2 important contests. OBE book is a huge part of the path I am to take - so it is vital that I get it done. Or at least done enough to send off to a publisher as a book proposal. Time is of the essence with both because as soon as college starts on May 18th - any extra time will be spent studying. So how in the world do I whip my own ass into shape? I know that I do well when I have deadlines and I have to be held accountable to someone. So here's a thought....why don't I just report to you guys? Every day I have to post that I did something...even if it's more research for BT or outlining chapt 1 for OBE.

That would make me accountable. Anyone else out there want to do something that they are having a hard time doing because they are not accountable? Why not post here with me. Leave a comment every day after my posts to what you have done. So what do you think? This will go from April 1st - May 1st and no - the April 1st start is not an April Fool's joke. I like this idea. How can I help people if I don't practice what I coach?

After May 1st - we'll see where I'm at and what needs tackled next.

Off to make dinner!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Monday, March 23, 2009

Michael, Mike And Seriously WTF!

I wrote the below $.02 Saturday/Sunday Morning.....

I should be sleeping - I really should. But here I am after drinking a bottle of wine - and I'm awake at 1:18 am. Doesn't make sense. Wine should have made me fall sleep. But oh no....not now. I have too much outside energy running around inside of me.

What does that mean? Well I can feel Bill being very connected. So is Will and Vincent. CJ is still hanging about - taking more of an interest in me than he ever thought he would or that he thought he was comfortable with, You know it's difficult to dream about someone most of your life and then all of a sudden have them wind up on your radar. That's what happened where Bill is concerned with me - and that what happened where I'm concerned with CJ. Especially since most of the dreams he can remember me in we were just kids. It's a bit disarming. And quite frankly you just want things to go back to the way they were - before your "new knowledge".

There's a part of me that's tired of new knowledge. Why can't something happen with the old knowledge before someone else shows up? I don't get it. Any of you - do you get it? Cause I'm at a lost. Like this guy named Michael (not to be confused with Mike from before). He's showed up in my "area" for years now - years. And for the most part I've been able to compartmentalize him. Keep him tucked away as a curiosity and that's it. But now this guy has superseded my curiosity. I want to know why. What possible connection do we have? And why now? Serious. Don't I have enough going on?

I asked Andrew. You know what he said? Vincent is too stuck in his life, Will is too scared, CJ is confused and Bill doesn't have the balls -- so we open up the connection with Michael. I have to ask - is he a chicken shit too? Or would he seek out to explore something that he doesn't quite understand? Andrew says he's an explorer. Always has been - ever since he was a kid. I don't know why Andrew is showing me Michael with a toy sail boat in his hands - but he is. The said boat is has a red base. Andrew also tells me that Michael's mother is something else - and he means that in a good way. She pushes, yet protects Michael. If she find something or someone that can be a positive part of Michael's life - she'll put two and two together - despite Michael protests. So I wonder then - what will happen when she comes upon my blog? When she puts me together with the dreams he's had most of his life. Then what? Does she call me 1st to chat? Or does she just hand the information over to him and guide him? I swear I don't know. I wish I did. But I don't.

I then said "screw it" and went to bed. We'll see if anything comes of this connection. I'm rather tired of the "one-way" feel I've had with the past group.

Michael has been kind enough to keep hanging around. I keep getting the oddest flash visions with him:

Vision 1 - He and I shake hands. I can feel a zap of electric go through me - although I try not to react to it. The same happened to him - I think. We are then sitting at a table with two other women. Michael asks if the two ladies would leave us. They do. He leans across the table at me - and with a very stern look on his face he asks - why me? I open my mouth and start to say because of his past....he waves his hand to signal stop. Give me the real reason - he demands. I sit there and just look at him - trying to figure out what I'm going to say. I finally say - do you believe in soul groups? He smacked his hands together and said - I knew you felt the energy when we shook hands.

Vision 2 - He and I are on the beach. We are by some sort of rock formation. As the sun sets, the beams hit a crystal in the rock formation - which gives off another beam of light to a cave off the coast.

Vision 3 - Michael is inside a house looking outside. From his POV I can see me running to Vincent and jumping in his arms. Michael takes a sip of coffee and says - if he hurts her I'll kill him with my bare hands. I hear a voice (sounds like Will) say - he'd no sooner hurt her than you or I would.

Vision 4 - He's at my 25th High School reunion with me and we're having a blast.

There's more -- but those are the ones I can remember off the top of my head.

My son told me tonight that guys are put on the Earth to drive girls crazy (I couldn't agree more) and for guys to get big muscles so that they can be chick magnets. LOL. I tried not to laugh. I told him to remember that girls are nothing but trouble. He replied - oh mom, guys are trouble too. Snicker...oh how right he is....

Speaking of trouble - there's a guy in Wooster who's a psychologist who I find to be interesting. He and I have known each other since I moved to Wooster - he lives by me. You know how you know when someone is interested in you? Well he's given me that sideways look for the last 8 years. When I could feel him looking at me - I would just keep looking straight ahead. He was married - I was married. Not about to go there or even give the appearance of going there. He was always polite when he saw me or my ex - never anything flirty or over the top. Well, then I got divorced. Still basically ignored him as I know his wife and I think she's a great person - I didn't want any signals to go anywhere that might be misread. So he tells me two weeks ago that he's getting a divorce - been separated at that time for a month. Thought I would hear it through the neighborhood gossip line. Ha! I'm not looking the other way any more. But since our kids go to the same school - I do keep everything low key - flip him a hi when I see him and that's about it. If we happen to be walking the same way in the morning - we'll chat. We'll see what happens - if anything. Well- something will happen, it's just a matter of what and when. He does have the same kick ass divorce lawyer that I had...that guy in Orville is great! What I need to do is to find out when his birthday is -- I pray he's not a Sag or a Leo. Been there - did that.

Oh and guess what? His name is Mike. Yeah - seriously. No - that connection with what's going on with Michael has not been lost on me.

I'm finally HOT in the Start Up Nation Contest! Whoo Hoo! I'm a smoking mamma!

On that note -- it's shower time:)

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Bill, Dreams And Changes!

Grab a drink and maybe a snack -- this one is long...

Wow - change is in the air - can you feel it? I know can! I have been a busy person for the last several weeks -- I think that this is the longest I've ever gone without posting. Sorry about that! I'll try to do better but I can't promise anything:)

For those of you born in the 60's or early 70's - can you feel the Saturn Uranus Opposition just kicking your tush? The tug away between structure and breaking free is especially intense for those in their late 30's and 40's. The dates of the tug a war are: Nov 4, 2008 - Feb 5, 2009 - Sept 15, 2009 - Apr 26, 2010 and July 26, 2010. With each occurrence pushing us closer to following our soul's path. This isn't much of a choice here - things will happen around you to push you. I talked about this in Monday's podcast --- no wonder I can't sleep:) Falling asleep isn't the problem - the constant dreams are starting to be.

Even when I ask for a break - I'm not getting it. This always means some major is coming up. My dreams - what I can remember of them (I'm honestly trying to forget so I can sleep which I think is making it worse) have either Bill, Ted or my son in them. Every night all 3 show up - normally in different dream visits - although Bill and Ted do show up occasionally. The last couple of days ex #2 has been showing back up. I think that I'm being pulled in his dreams. They all involve me and him getting back together - but not as a married couple. This last one he moves back into the house- but that's only because he has no where else to go. I move my office into my room so he can have the office. I remember this really ill feeling I had in my stomach at the thought of him living here. I woke myself up. Ex #1 showed up last week several times. The dream visits with him would dip into the romantic/sexual aspect. After the last dream visit last week - I put up my protection so that he would not get back in. I told my guides in no uncertain terms that I wasn't heading back into ex #2 dreams either. I have no idea why either one of them would be bothering me now. Maybe they drank out of the same water source?

Bill has been everywhere I looked. No matter what I've been doing - he pops into my mind. Or I see a picture that reminds me of him. With Bill, I can feel him figuring things out between us. In past dreams he has said that he got it - the connection - but that over thinking mind of his is still trying to put every piece in its place. Plus his soul and his guides are trying to send him down the correct path without him thinking it to death. On top of all this his emotions are all over the board. He's very sensitive. I feel sorry for anyone who pisses him off right now.

I have some good news to tell you in 2 weeks. But I can't tell you till then :):)

In other news -- I'm going back to college. I know - what a shocker? But it's true. When I left in 1996 I was finishing my junior year in Bus Admin. Going back I may be a senior to start - but now my major is Psychology. After graduation - Masters in Marriage & Family Counseling -- and if that much schooling hasn't killed me - Doctorate in Sexual Health. Yes - I'm going to be a sex therapist. That clicked in last week. Since then - things have been going much better. Not fabo - but better. Told me ex #2 - he laughed at me - ass hole. But that's ok - it'll just push me harder to prove him wrong. So during the day I'll home school my son - at night - college. Somewhere in there I'll fit in homework, housework and oh yeah - work. I opted out of the traditional foreign langue requirement and am instead taking Sign Language. The hearing impaired have sexual and marriage problems too - I bet it can get frustrating to go to a hearing person's therapy.

My son thought it was great that I'm going back to school. He is going to love to see his mom do homework:) I'll be back up at The University of Akron. My son did have a mini cow and worry that I wouldn't be writing scripts any longer. I told him - never you fear - I have to write like you have to play with your Hot Wheels. He liked that idea. Besides - just got a new idea for a TV show I have to write:) But 1st I have to finish a couple of other rewrites.

This is the 3rd day in a row that I've forced myself to go on Keen:) I figure if I keep forcing, it'll be a habit. If anyone wants some free minutes - email me.

I have this wonderful stone spirit called Wulfenite. It's not as flashy as the rest of my stones, so it normally doesn't get a lot of attention (since I overlook it). But lately it's been calling out. What this stone promotes is the acceptance of the existence of the negative aspects that exist in this crazy -mixed-up world in order to allow one to recognize issues and not allow roadblock to stop or slow down progress. It also helps on to continue on in spite of potential limitations. And yes - it came to my attention last week. So it's no surprise that I'm going back to school. This little gem also allows one to transition between the physical plane to the psychic and astral planes with a quickness. It's been wanting to go with me into my bedroom - but I don't sleep as it is. I'm afraid to see how much dreaming I'll do with it. But I may try -- just to see. In fact, I just went and put in my bedroom.

What else can this puppy do? It can help to bring forth the knowledge and skills needed for white magic. It promotes contact with the spiritual world in the form one manifests; to allow the attunement to those of ancient civilizations (in my case - Atlantis), to those of the near distant past or those of future worlds. It makes a strong connection and attunement to higher dimensions. It also stimulates a bonding between souls who are in the Earth plane and have agreed to meet again during this life time (hear me Bill, Ted, Will and Vincent)?

My guides also had me change my 3 stone pendant. Now it has Herkimer Diamond, Tektite and Moldavite. Now with the HD - I have 2 HD that were joined at one time. A larger one and then a smaller one that attached to the side. The larger one is for Bill - the smaller one is mine. Instead of putting the one that is mine in the pendant - my guides told me to put Bill's in. The HD has a ton of helpful properties. But the jest of it is: helps one to begin again in this lifetime,,, assists one in clearing the body-mind system of unconscious fears and repressions, allowing for total relaxation and expansion of the life energy. .. known as a stone of attunement.... stimulates clairvoyant and clairaudient abilities...it also facilitates and strengthens telepathic connections. What else is nice about this stone is that you can store information into this stone before you give it to another. Maybe I'm supposed to wear it now so that it stores my energy in it before I give it to Bill?

Tektite has a ton of helpful attributes as well. It's rather cool that it is from outer space:) It is said to a charm of great power, as well as bring wealth and fertility to it's owner. It provides one with encouragement to gather knowledge. It helps to sweep away any lasting impressions of undesirable experiences and holds onto lasting impressions of desirable experiences. Tektite balances the feminine and masculine properties of ones character. It also acts to strengthen ones energy field and to provide for increased contact during daily activities. It accelerates thought transmissions within the physical realm and between the physical realm and the location of origination of the stone. Using tektite can also draw one to another, or another to one, due to information provided during transmissions, or due to an attraction which is recognized by others who have the same transmission frequencies aligned in the ethereal body (me, Bill, Ted, Will and Vincent again).

Now Moldavite is a form of tektite as it is also from space. But this is considered a "gem quality" stone of ET origin. This is a powerful stone - one full of energy and purpose. It stimulates cooperation with those of ET's origin with those on Earth. It carries one beyond the physcial reality to a home that has long been forgotten - absent from the conscious mind - as it provides the visions of eternality and the energy to translate the visions into reality. It facilities strong, clear, and direct interdimensional interconnected-mess between ones consciousness and the higher planes of light. It expands the scope of vibrational energy/dimensions which one can approach, while allowing an easier path to those dimensions one has already been to. One will see more clearly and will see with an expansion of vision. it works well with the third-eye, throat charka and the crown chakra.

I have no idea what my guides have planned for me with this stone combination. But my intuition is telling me it's about connecting with Bill in the physical realm. He was the key that unlocked all of this - the dreams, soul mates, OBE, soul clusters - the whole kit and caboodle. He's the reason I started this blog. To be able to sit down and talk to him about everything would be a dream come true. I don't want anything from him but a nice long conversation. I'm just dying to compare notes:)

My mother almost died the other day - or should I say she should of died. But my grams had her back. She was traveling along 77 in Akron - during a busy time - when the SUV in front of her hit something - it flew into the air and scooped up under her car. She smelled something burning and was able to pull over to the right (this is a section of the highway where the on/off ramps are too short and normally cars are on it moving at a high speed). She tried to go somewhere - but the smell of tire rubber was too great. An hour later a tow truck picked up the car. Fast forward - the mechanic calls her in (my sister takes her to the garage)...he shows her what went under her car - a tire wedge that truckers use behind their wheels when they are pulled over or stopped for the night. It flew under her car and wedged itself in-between my mom's front driver's side tired and the tire well. What SHOULD of happened is the car would of stopped immediately (when she was going 65), flipped up in the air and rolled a few times. This would have caused the heavy traffic behind her to slam into her - causing more death and injury. It costs her $12.50 to get her car fixed. It wasn't her time to die. For that I am very grateful.

I think I MAY have figured out what type if disorder effects my son. It's called Sensory Integration Disorder (http://www.spdfoundation.net/).

"SPD can affect people in only one sense–for example, just touch or just sight or just movement–or in multiple senses. One person with SPD may over-respond to sensation and find clothing, physical contact, light, sound, food, or other sensory input to be unbearable. Another might under-respond and show little or no reaction to stimulation, even pain or extreme hot and cold. In children whose sensory processing of messages from the muscles and joints is impaired, posture and motor skills can be affected. These are the "floppy babies" who worry new parents and the kids who get called "klutz" and "spaz" on the playground. Still other children exhibit an appetite for sensation that is in perpetual overdrive. These kids often are misdiagnosed - and inappropriately medicated - for ADHD.

SPD is most commonly diagnosed in children, but people who reach adulthood without treatment also experience symptoms and continue to be affected by their inability to accurately and appropriately interpret sensory messages.

These "sensational adults" may have difficulty performing routines and activities involved in work, close relationships, and recreation. Because adults with SPD have struggled for most of their lives, they may also experience depression, underachievement, social isolation, and/or other secondary effects.

Sadly, misdiagnosis is common because many health care professionals are not trained to recognize sensory issues. The SPD Foundation is dedicated to researching these issues, educating the public and professionals about their symptoms and treatment, and advocating for those who live with Sensory Processing Disorder and sensory challenges associated with other conditions."

My kid is in overdirve 24/7 and has been misdiagnosised with ADHD. But - of course - I cannot find anyone in my area who I can take him to. The place in Stow Ohio doesn't exist any more and all other places are 1 1/2 hrs. + away. So I don't know what in the heck I'm going to do - but I have to do something.

I found this great place called: Day Spa For The Mind. From their site:
"Day Spa for the Mind is an online space where you can relax, unwind, and clear your mind to make room for positive change in your life. We all have busy lives and the thought of meditation or personal development, even though we all know the benefits, can seem all too daunting.

Day Spa for the Mind combines meditation techniques, hypnotherapy and guided visualization to help relieve stress, create deep relaxation and focus your mind towards attracting wealth, love, creativity, motivation, and inner peace."

I opened an account. Thus far I really like it. Try out their 10 min sample and see for yourself.

I'm sure I have typos in this entry - I'm tired. If you want, point them out, just don't be too rude about it please:)

For those of you that I owe email to - I know I do. I'm doing the best I can. I'm hoping to be caught up by the time I hit 42.

What else is happening -- I know there's more - but right now I'm brain dead so I think I'll stop and get some shut-eye.

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Thursday, February 26, 2009

Atlantis, The Meadow And Dream Time!

Grab a drink and get situated -- this one's kinda long....

This week just has not gone as planned - same as last week. Hell - the whole month of February has been a huge problem not only for me, but for my poor son. He now has the flu - the nasty flu with the high fever, body aches, headache, nausea...I am just praying to anyone who will listen in the universe for me not to get this. I'm trying to push through with the bronchitis I think I have - thank you very much. I don't need anything else.

But what I've been doing with my congestion and nasal snafu is sending white ball of energy to help speed up the healing process. For my lungs I imagine a nice big ball of white light going into my lungs, through the back, and back in again out the front. I do the same with my throat and my sinuses. Anytime I do this, I feel much better afterwards. So I'm trying to send the light through several times a day.

I don't quite get 2009 yet - what it has in store for me. It hasn't gone as I thought it would. Thus far all scripts and what not have been turned down. I'm about as creative as a barn door - which isn't very helpful in the rewrite process. Readings aren't there - readings on Keen & Live Person haven't been going very well - the people I do help (not very many) that don't know me or how I work - give me bad marks. Those that have used me before for a reading (not just an email exchange) - I've been fine with - they know how I work. The one thing that has worked - I guess - is the Wake Up Your Orgasm podcast. My Ask Allie podcast gets about 500 - 600 faithful listeners a week. The WUYO podcast gets about 3000 - 5000 a week. I know - how crazy is that? It's normally in iTunes "Top Audio Podcasts" for sexuality.

I did ask my guides to show me what direction I should be heading into -- and it looks like sex advice is it. Although they are telling me not to give up on my scripts either - that I have to keep pushing that right along with my OBE book and the WUYO podcast. But since I know I can't concentrate on two things at once - I have to pick - book or script rewrite. They pull on me the same.

Which brings me to a radio show. I want to do one radio show, once a week to start with. Now since sex seems to have caught on - do I have it be a sex advice themed show? Or since the majority of people I know work in the metaphysical/healing fields - should it be more like Ask Allie? Or - should I mash them both and do a "Allie Theiss" show that encompasses all of it. But I think that would be too wide spread - don't you think? I like the being a sex psychic and I like promoting that part. It's easier , I think, to bring the psychic part into the sex than it is to bring the sex into the psychic part. Does that make sense? I know it'll be clearer the closer I get to actually doing this. But I should would appreciate some clear cut answers every now and again. Answers that are extremely obvious and leave to room for interpretation.

All of the visions I have of me giving workshops in a large arena deal with the Wake Up Your Orgasm theme. So again, I suppose, that's another sign. I can see the whole thing - a large gathering with me giving a WUYO talk 3x over a course of 3 days. Then there are smaller workshops that people can sign up for and get the know on different kind of fetishes, toys and of course OBE sex. There are also a host of vendors there to sell their fetish products, clothes and toys. Wow - I just got all of that. Pretty cool.

I keep getting a push to go back to the meadow. For those of you who don't know what the meadow is - it's a place that Bill, Ted and I used to meet quite a bit several years ago. Then the woman who actually owns the meadow in the physical world - we had a major falling out - and we've only been back once since then. I'm getting really bothered by it right now. Oh hell - I'm going to grab my healing want and see what happens - hold on.

Okay - first of all when I grabbed my healing wand and closed my eyes - it felt so strange in my hands, like is was bendable - like one of those bendy kid straws you see. As I was at the meadow - it felt like I was bending it, reshaping it, but when I was done at the meadow it was feeling very solid again.

Now at the meadow I was greeted by both Bill and Ted. They looked pretty good - run down, tired, but overall good. The meadow was lush, green and full of vibrant energy - like it had once been. Several hundred feet away I spied a woman. I knew immediately that she was the woman I/we had the falling out with - the one who owns the meadow. I didn't want to go anywhere near her. But then Jesus showed up (this seems to be a favorite place of his as well) and told me that I have to walk over and see her. We need each other right now - I/we need the meadow to move forward in our lives and she needs us in the meadow so that she can move forward with her life.

I told Bill and Ted to stay put and I walked across the grass - felt very velvet like on my bare feet. I was close to her and I just stared at her. She held out her hand, but I didn't take it. She repeated what Jesus had already said - we need to make peace in order to move forward. I shook her hand - but I told her to stay away from us. She nodded in agreement - and she was gone.

I went back to Bill and Ted and let them know that we should be able to come here again without any problems. The large oak tree that Bill and I used to travel up in to reach the heavens had a white glow up top. I could also hear some angelic calling. I looked at the guys and said that they want to talk with us. Now Ted had never been up there with Bill and I. And he didn't want to go. He said he wasn't ready - such a look of fear in his eyes. I told him that if he wasn't ready he wouldn't be here. He didn't care - he said he'd do this later. With that he disappeared.

I looked at Bill and asked if we really needed to go up? I could feel the tug so I knew it was important - but like Ted I just didn't feel like it right now. Bill said no - it can wait until tomorrow. We laid down under the oak tree, I wrapped myself around Bill, he put his arms around me. I said that I missed these visits - he agreed - he did too. I mentioned that the powers that be will snag us in our dreams. He laughed and said - of course they will. And with that the connection was broken.

What does this all mean? Specially I don't have a clue. But I'm sure it has to deal with the increased time I have been spending in Atlantis during my dream time...

Each time I have visited Atlantis over the last week, I have been clothed in a very deep purple or violet flowing robe or maybe it's a dress. But it's very light feeling, like I have no clothes on. Bare feet with nothing on underneath this dress. There is a gold belt or sash around the middle. My hair is up - I have no jewelry on. But I do notice a star tattoo/birthmark inside my left wrist. The star is a light red/purple in color - too light to be a tattoo I think. Maybe times I go from person to person, giving them some sort of clear liquid from a crystal vial. They open their mouths and I pop a few drops in. It's like their daily wellness drops. Then I'm at a clinic of sorts. When people come in, they put their palms on a crystal scanner - after they are scanned, they are allowed into the next section of the clinic for treatment. I'm told that this security was put in because people from other sects were trying to sneak in and have us heal them. Seems that the other sects already began to fall to the dark side ( I feel like I'm in Star Wars) and our sect was one of the few remaining that was all light.

Last night though - it was interesting when I walked deep into a cave. There were no lights in the cave, but I made my way without missing a step. I emerged into this large cavern that was aglow with thousands of crystals (although this was not the Crystal Cavern I've talked about before). In here, were dozens of people from not only our sect, but many others, engaged in an orgy. But it wasn't an orgy like you would think about now a days - it didn't have that negative aura surrounding it. During the time of Atlantis, love was given and received freely - pleasuring one another in a group setting was the way we spread the love (so to speak). I kept hearing that we were vessels of love. That having a physical body to make love to was a new experience for a handful of us who were born just as energy - myself included. When we came to Atlantis through the portal - that is when we received a physical body. Although the pleasure derived from merging energy with energy was greater - the physical aspect of connecting proved to be not only interesting but fun. I could feel though that this form of sexual expression would frustrate me at times as I always wanted to strive for that orgasmic punch I had when I was pure energy.

Anyways -- more on the Atlantis orgy at Out of Body Ecstasy.

It just dawned on me - -just now. Why I'm here - one of the main reasons. Oh hell - sometimes I am just so slow. The more times souls spend in the physical body - the less they remember what it felt like to love outside the physical body. That is what I'm here to do (in part) is to have people reconnect with love & sex outside the physical body - to help them get in touch with who they truly are - their soul - and not that physical body they're in. For the most part, very few people can remember the orgasmic qualities to being pure energy and having sex. Hence - here I am. To help people with their sex lives by using their energy bodies. Also to get sex out of the closet. It's not a dirty thing - it's a wonderful, necessary process for our souls. I guess this just answered my radio show question - didn't it?

Can you believe it's been a year since I met Will? God how time flies. What I wouldn't do to meet him again. How I wish he would've called like he said he would. I wonder what part of me scared him? Was it that I knew him in a different light than everyone else did? Maybe he was worried that by knowing me he'd mess up his current relationship? He could be fearful of change? Whatever it was - I only wish that he showed the same faith that I did when I hopped on that plane to see him with my son. Just a little bit of faith - that's all. Which makes me wonder how Vincent will act. And even if I want to risk being rejected by him.

Today starts the Telepathic Connection e-class. If you haven't signed up yet, you still have time to do so!

BTW..I'm still not HOT yet with the Start Up Nation's Mom Contest <--- Keep voting please!

Kirk - email me - I can't find your email address anywhere.

I need to know from the people who read this blog if any of you would be interested in being a moderator for a GA board I'm starting. I need someone for magic/spells and another one for OBE (astral travel, not sex), dreams and telepathic connections. If anyone is interested - email me . I can't pay you, but it will be exposure for yourself and if you have a business.

I know that there's more to tell you - but right now I haven't got a clue to what it is:) Besides - I think that this is long enough!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie :)

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Monday, February 16, 2009

The Ego, Lessons And Ted!

Today the snow was falling - falling - falling down in Wooster. If I looked at the sky, 1/2 is dark and the other 1/2 light. Reminded me of the battle of good vs. evil. Since I am in Amish Hell - the sun faded from view and the sky was a drappy gray - yuck. Just before the sun set it broke through the clouds for 20 min of sunshine. We really could use more sun around here - seriously.

So on today's podcast I talked about how the ego is our enemy. I really believe that. Our egos hold us back, frustrated us, give us impressions of others or ourselves that are not in line with reality - egos make us less than what we are meant to me. I think that sucks. The whole ego thing was a lesson of mine. I don't think I've learned my lesson completely - but at least the light bulb turned on so that I can make improvements in myself. I get why I've been treading water for so long. I got the responsibility lesson a couple of years ago when I got divorced. Next I'll be heading into the patience lesson (even more so than I have been). Why? Because I'm going to homeschool my son next year.

His current school just is not for him. It's like fitting a square peg into a round hole - no matter how much you try - it isn't going to work. I see him suffer because of it - he's just a different kind of kid - he can't help it. The labels he has for being weird, strange and different doesn't help him. All he wants is friends and to do so he gravitates towards the kids who are different - but in a bad way (meaning they get in a lot of trouble being bad) and this in turn gets him in trouble and the cycle continues. My ex and I talked about it - I told him for as long as we're in Ohio, he's going to have to help. Science and math were always the ex's strong suits - so I suggested he be our son's "coach" (which is what the school calls the adult since there are online teachers) in those subjects. He agreed. But we'll see what happens come the school year.

Stress will come from keeping the kid and the dog apart since all they like to do is aggravate one another. Somehow, of course, I will have to work. I mulled over getting up at 4:00 am - working on Keen till 8:00 am and then do school. But I know there is no way in hell I'm getting up at 4 am. So I'll have to keep thinking.

Ted made a very nice comeback over the weekend. I wrote about it in the OBE blog. I was actually very supposed to see him since Will and Vincent were the ones that kept popping up in my energy. Will - it feels to me - is coming to a turning point in his life and he's not sure which way to turn. His current and long-time relationship feels very shaky. But by being together so long - is it love that keeps things together? Or the "being used to" the partner? My money is on the "used to". Vincent - poor guy is just so confused. He has no clue on where to turn or what to do. His life is such a "pineapple upside down cake" right now that he's frozen from making any important decisions. And Ted -- he is crashing hard. A big crash. I am hoping that he has hit the bottom without 1) landing in the hospital 2) going to rehab. A divorce has to be soon -- even if she is trying like hell to get pregnant.

Trouble (the cat) was running after air today - I'm going to assume it was Indy coming back to say hi. Ever since he died Trouble has been glued to poor Brodie who tries to convince Trouble that he is not a dog - but a cat.

Off to bed...have a good night!

Crystal Sunshine!
Allie ;)

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